At the root of it all
by andree campbell
Summary: House wants to be with Cuddy. Simple as that. Problem is he can't voice it properly. Cuddy is involved with Lucas and is afraid to jeopardize a good relationship for the possibility of one with a man she loves but can't ultimately trust.
1. Chapter 1

"So what was her reaction?" Dr. Nolan asked carefully. He quietly yet subtly studied Greg House's expression, Nolan's eyes flicking between House's eyes and House's hands fidgeting with the curve of his cane.

"She didn't say much of anything. It was more of a look. You know, like 'I'm onto you,'" House admitted.

"And you took this to mean….what?" Dr. Nolan said patiently.

"I …" House stopped and stared at his cane. "I honestly have no idea what she meant but I wanted her to know I want her…in that way."

"Is that the only way you want Dr. Cuddy? Your boss…sexually?" Dr. Nolan had to stand and turn away slight from House to avoid House reading his expression. Nolan made his way across his spacious office to the coffee pot and refilled his wide mouthed cup. House watched him closely.

"Of course! Have you ever s_een_ Dr. Cuddy?" House began.

"Yes. I have. She's a very attractive woman. Lovely in everyway. You're a lucky man to have such a beautiful boss who obviously cares for you." Dr. Nolan said steadily, his back to House on purpose, allowing his patient to react without inspection. House took advantage of his pseudo-privacy and found his mouth had dropped open by Dr. Nolan's astute assessment.

"I suppose I am. She's got a killer bod, nice rack, hot in every way…." House began to brag before Dr. Nolan turned and glared at him.

"So you want me to believe you're only attracted to her because of her appearance, her beauty and body. That's it?"

House was caught and tried to cover up but realized it was too obvious given their previous sessions.

"Well, Cuddy's one hot woman but…I like her for other reasons." 

Dr. Nolan smiled to himself and was unable to withhold the small laugh he afforded himself. House noticed.

"What?" House snapped.

"So, you like her for other reasons," Nolan repeated.

"That's what I said." House defended himself warily.

"Okay then."

"No, no, no. Not so fast. What are you trying to say?" House demanded.

"I'm just noting what you said, Dr. House," Nolan replied calmly before taking a small sip of his coffee. "If you say you like her, then that's fine."

House glared at Dr. Nolan across the office. He knew Nolan had detected something more.

"Oh for God's sake, just say it!" House grumbled.

Dr. Nolan watched his patient closely but declined to comment, acting all the more nonchalant and calm. "Say what, exactly?"

House stared at him for a moment and looked away. "Nothing."

Nolan returned to his chair opposite from Dr. House and sat down slowly. "You were saying?"

House glanced up nervously at Dr. Nolan. "What?"

"So you plied Dr. Cuddy with an expensive expresso machine and even made her a cup with foam, if I heard you correctly. Did she like it?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"So what was the real reason you gave it to her out of the blue so to speak?" Nolan stared into his own cup of café au lait waiting for House to answer truthfully and avoid deflection.

"It gave me a reason to see her, …to be nice to her. To let her know…." House paused.

"To let her know what?" Dr. Nolan asked innocently.

House fidgeted with his curved cane handle. "To let her know that I'd like to be with her…"

"Sexually?" Dr. Nolan prompted.

"Well, d'uh. Of course."

"You think that's what she wanted to hear?" Dr. Nolan said quietly as he looked up into Dr. House's confused expression. "Or is that what you want her to believe?"

House snapped his eyes to Nolan's. "She knows she's hot.."

"Yes, and every hot woman has heard enough come-ons to bore her to death. Sounds to me like you're afraid to go past the surface with Dr. Cuddy," Nolan said matter-of-factly. "You are afraid of her, am I right?"

House looked surprised at Dr. Nolan's words. "Of course not!"

"So why do you persist in keeping things so superficial with the one woman you're obviously interested in going deeper with?" Dr. Nolan couldn't suppress his annoyance.

"Who said anything about being in love with my boss, and by the way, you ended with a preposition. You Amish?" House sat forward quickly as if he was readying to leave the session immediately.

"Nope. Not Amish but you're right. I apologize, Greg. I didn't mean to inject my own thoughts into the session. I just thought you weren't aware of your own feelings. It seems to me you've been trying to keep Dr. Cuddy contained to just a sexual object to avoid recognizing your emotional connection to her."

House sat silently.

Dr. Nolan continued. "I mean each and every time something enormous happens in your life, Dr. Cuddy seems to be there for you far beyond the scope of a boss-employee relationship. And you know it."

House closed his eyes and the words uttered by Dr. Nolan rang through his consciousness.

"What if I was?"

"What if you were what?" Nolan asked.

"What if I was _in love_ with her? It doesn't really matter now since she's got someone else in her life. Someone who wants to be there for her…"

"Well that certainly would suck!" Dr. Nolan said abruptly. House glanced at his doctor somewhat shocked by the vernacular response.

"It certainly does." House agreed.

"So what do you plan to do about it?"

"I guess I have to wait it out and see what happens between her and her boyfriend." House admitted.

"Somehow you don't strike me as the wait-it-out-type of guy. That's your best idea?" Dr. Nolan seemed annoyed and bored.

"Whattaya know, our session appears to be over. Same time Thursday?" House deflected

"Yeah, sure," Nolan said as he watched Dr. House struggle to get out of the chair and hustle across the room to exit."


	2. Chapter 2 Expresso

House watched his boss across the cafeteria. Dr. Cuddy had entered the hospital cafeteria fully engrossed in her blackberry studying the messages as she scrolled through them, unaware of the excitement she was causing in the chest of 50-year-old Gregory House.

He took in her appearance from her slender ankles to her slim waist to her lovely clavical bones. Her slender neck was partially blocked from view by her long sleek dark brown hair as she whipped it over her shoulder and continued viewing her messages in her small phone. House marveled at her peripheral viewing skills as she negotiated her way through the cafeteria lines without taking her eyes off the screen of her cell device.

House smiled. She was something. Dr. Lisa Cuddy of the stunning hour-glass figure, the lovely legs, the high heels with perfect grace and authoritative pace. He couldn't find one physical flaw to concentrate on that could possibly deter his attraction to her. Yep, Cuddy was an incredibly attractive woman. One that Gregory House couldn't tear his eyes from. Dr. Cuddy apparently finished her messages' review and clicked her phone shut but not before reaching for a tray and bringing her eyes to meet his.

House grinned at her and gave a small wave of his hand. Cuddy nodded back to him and continued on. House wondered if she would leave right away or take the time to eat in the cafeteria. She'd answer that question in a few moments.

Cuddy had to make time to eat and the never-ending list of emails and messages would have to wait. She snapped her phone shut and reached for a cafeteria tray. She could feel eyes on her and glanced straight up into the glacial blue eyes of Dr. Gregory House. Was he staring at her?

He had waved and smiled at her. She would have to stop by his table and acknowledge him. She still hadn't quite figured out the reason behind his expresso-machine gift. That was definitely unlike him. Lunch with him might give her the opportunity to find out.

"Can I join you?" Cuddy asked gently.

"I was hoping you would," House gestured to the chair next to him. She chose another, the one directly opposite of his.

"How's your day going?" Cuddy said politely.

"Better, now." House smiled. He was definitely flirting with her. "Yours?"

"Same crap, different day." House raised his eyebrows at her phrase. Cuddy glanced up and smiled to soften it. "Budget's due at the end of the day."

"Oh," House paused unsure of whether or not to make a colorful remark about her breasts but chose not to, opting instead to talk about something he rarely brought up. "How's Rachel these days? I haven't seen her since our medical trip."

Cuddy stopped eating in shock and stared at House. He was trying and she knew it. Cuddy smiled at his effort. "Rachel's wonderful. Thank you for asking. She's really racing around the house and its not easy to keep up with her!"

House nodded. "She's a cute kid. She takes after her mother…"

Cuddy was confused momentarily as they both knew Rachel wasn't hers biologically.

House caught the meaning and finished his sentence, "racing around the hospital and its never easy keeping up with you."

Cuddy grinned that thousand-watt smile he loved so much. "You manage to find me when you need me."

"True. How's Lucas?"

Cuddy choked on her salad. "What?"

"How's that goofy guy you're seeing, Mucas er Lucas." House said with a smirk.

"You really want to know?"

"Not really but I'm being polite. It's a new technique I'm trying out."

"Was that why you asked about Rachel?" Cuddy seemed confused and a little deflated.

"No, I actually wanted to know how she's doing. Lucas….meh."

Cuddy laughed and took a sip of water. Her eyes never left his.

"Thank you for the expresso machine, House." Cuddy murmured. "It was very nice of you to do that."

"Well, I know how much you love your caffeine," House said playfully. "Figured chasing a toddler around might wear you out so …."

"Thanks. That was really thoughtful." Cuddy said sincerely.

"You're welcome," House said shyly. He meant it and she knew it.

It was a start.

"Then what happened?" Dr. Nolan pressed House to continue.

"We talked a bit more and then she left." House said plainly.

"Nothing more?" Dr. Nolan said disappointedly.

"Nope. There never is."

House's last comment caught the psychiatrist's attention. "But you'd like that to change?"

House stared at his feet for a moment before glancing up at his doctor. The therapy sessions were intensely personal as they're meant to be but that didn't make it any less uncomfortable.

"Of course. She's just with somebody else." 

"We've been through that conversation before, Greg. What are you going to do about that?"

"The expresso-machine …was my way of being nice to her."

"And it worked. She liked it, right? Sort of your way of express-o-ing how you feel?" Dr. Nolan sat forward, clearly interested in hearing more about the new direction House was attempting. "Pardon the pun." House rolled his eyes. Nolan continued, "Of course, you don't have to give her presents to let her know you like her and want to be with her."

"True but its easier…" House mumbled.

"Nothing worth having ever came easily," Dr. Nolan said dryly. House glanced away.

"What's holding you back, exactly?" Dr. Nolan pushed. House shifted in his chair and gazed at the ceiling.

"I don't know."

"Okay." Dr. Nolan sat back in his chair and waited for House to speak or elaborate somehow.

"Cuddy …seems happy with Lucas. Who am I to mess that up?"

"And you're sure she's happy with him? How do you know?"

"I don't really it's just she's still with him so I figure she's got to be interested in him or she'd have left him by now." House said flatly. "Lucas helps her with Rachel a lot."

"How do you know that?"

"Lucas."

"He told you?"

"Yeah."

"So Dr. Cuddy's with Lucas because he's good with her daughter?" Dr. Nolan tried to sound out the information as it dribbled out.

"Well, I'm sure that's not the only thing…" House trailed off.

"You think Dr. Cuddy is actually in love with Lucas?" Dr. Nolan prompted.

"I have no idea!" House said loudly surprising himself and Dr. Nolan who simply smiled at House. "Why are you smiling like that?"

"You're upset…you get upset every time the subject comes up about Dr. Cuddy's affections …"

"It's _**no**_ secret I want to be with her! I've told you that."

"True. But have you actually told Dr. Cuddy that?" Nolan set his coffee cup down and stretched back into his chair crossing his legs at the ankles and propping his fingertips into a church steeple between both hands.

"Well, yeah, sort of …"

"Sort of?"

"Yeah."

"No. You've implied sexual interest in her but I don't believe you've ever indicated a real desire for a relationship with her?" Dr. Nolan was too sharp.

"I asked her to move in with me…"

"Wasn't that shortly before your breakdown? I doubt she holds that offer in much regard given the hallucinations and all."

House looked very uncomfortable.

"Greg, relax. I'm here to help you work through the issues. No one but you and I are ever going to know what we're talking about in these sessions. You can tell me anything and you don't have to worry about me judging you. I just want you to feel better about your life and to get on with a happier life going forward."

"Yeah, okay. Thanks." House was embarrassed at how easily Dr. Nolan had read his mind so to speak.

"Do you think you're not good enough for Dr. Cuddy?"

"What woman wants to start a life with a former drug-addict, mental-patient gimp?" House said gruffly.

"Wasn't the mental hospitalization due to the vicodin addiction? And that addiction was due to your pain management attempts at dealing with the infarction. How about you cut yourself a little slack and remember you're human and you make mistakes."

"Cuddy doesn't make mistakes," House mumbled.

"Really? That's what you think? She's perfect, am I right?" Dr. Nolan was beginning to annoy House.

"No, she's not perfect but pretty darn close."

"Yeah, I can see how that would be too much for any man," Dr. Nolan said thoughtfully. "You're right, Greg. Cuddy's just out of your league. I mean, she's accomplished, beautiful, funny and intelligent and there's killer chemistry with you…_had _killer chemistry with you. She wouldn't want some world-class diagnostician who makes her laugh and who she was once clearly attracted to … limping around her house playing with her adopted daughter. Am I right?"

House glared at Dr. Nolan. "I know what you're doing and it won't work."

"Of course you know. You're way too intelligent to not see it. Problem is you seem to be a bit well…cowardly about Dr. Cuddy."

House was angry at the choice of words. His chin jutted out in defiance.

"What's the worst that could happen, Greg?" Dr. Nolan got up and began to pace around the room. "Seriously, so you make a move and wait to see what happens, right? Option A, she rejects you for Lucas. Okay, that hurts but at least you know where she stands. Option B, she accepts you and breaks up with Lucas. Now you've got her right where you want her. She's yours if you ask her. Right?"

"I thought therapy is where I offer up the options and figure things out for myself. Are you in some sort of office pool?" House deflected.

"Aah yesss. Deflection. Now we're getting somewhere," Nolan grinned. "So is the real issue more about you not really knowing what it is you want?"

"I want Cuddy." House said truthfully.

"In what way?" 

"How many ways are there?" House jabbed back.

"Well, lets see. There's sexual, there's love and affection, there's satisfying curiosity, there's immediacy versus long-term, there's flings versus marriage, jealousy versus bonds, stability versus one-night-stands…"

"Yeah, okay. I get it." House glared again.

"So which is it?" Nolan asked. "In what way?"

"You tell me. You're the doctor. What exactly is my problem?" House spun the issue back to the psychiatrist.

"You're afraid of both outcomes, rejection and acceptance." Dr. Nolan smiled at House.

"So…"

"So the question is why?" Nolan stared into House's vulnerable face. "You're afraid it won't work and you're afraid it would work. You're prepared for the first more negative state of things but you're too afraid to expose your true desires because you can't bear to be any more vulnerable than you already think you are."

"So I only _think _I'm vulnerable." House mulled over the phrase.

"Like I said, what's the worst that could happen? It would hurt and you'd be alone…like you are now. If I didn't know better I'd think you prefer to be miserable because you've gotten use to it out of habit."

"Explain then why I keep coming to see you for therapy, Dr. Smarty Pants."

Dr. Nolan grinned at House. "Because misery loves company."

House chuckled. Dr. Nolan leaned forward and placed his hand on House's shoulder, "You know you don't deserve to be miserable and even the curmudgeonly Dr. House is entitled to have a happy life, if you're willing."

House nodded. "Okay. I'm willing."

"Then go get her. It's the one constant thing in your life for the past seven years. What are you waiting for?"

House didn't move.

"It's okay to be nervous, terrified even. After all she _is_ a woman and you're just a man. The only thing you got on her is height. Use it when you can, okay?" Nolan teased.

"What if she fires me?"

"She won't."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do."

"Seriously?"

Nolan stood up and waited for House to stand. "I'll tell you how I know at next week's session. Deal?"

"Fair enough. Next week." House shook hands with Nolan and left for the door. Pausing before opening it, House looked over his shoulder at Nolan, "You're certain I won't get fired?"

"Just trust me on this, Greg. As long as you don't molest her, you won't get fired. Just tell her how you feel."

House rolled his eyes and smirked. "Sure, take all the fun out of it!" He closed the door behind as he exited.


	3. Chapter 3 Clarity

"I told her." House admitted. "How I felt, I mean."

"Really?" Dr. Nolan didn't sound convinced or rather maybe slightly doubtful.

"I did. What, you don't believe me?" House asked challengingly.

"What did you say?" Dr. Nolan added a spoon of sugar to his coffee and stirred it slowly.

"She asked me to dinner and I turned her down."

"Why? That sounds like a chance to get a little closer," Dr. Nolan said gently.

"It was but I thought she was doing that because Wilson was trying to keep me out of the apartment so he could fornicate with his devil beast of an ex-wife."

"So is that what Cuddy was doing?"

"Yeah, it was. She didn't realize why but she was doing what Wilson asked her to do and I don't need ….want a pity date with Cuddy," House added as he rubbed both his eyes trying to hide his face to some extent.

"So how exactly did you tell how you felt about her. Did I miss something?"

"Cuddy said she wanted us to be friends…." 

"Oh, boy…that's not good," Dr. Nolan interjected.

"Exactly. That's when I told her that's the very last thing I wanted for her and me." House shifted in his chair and began twirling the cane between his hands. The gesture was a nervous tick, pure and simple.

"What did she say?"

"Nothing. But she understood my meaning and then she left."

"You did it, Greg. You let her know how you felt. Nicely done." Nolan drained his coffee and set the cup back on the coffee table between them. "So now what?"

"Good question. How about you tell me how you know Cuddy won't fire me for telling her how I feel about her?"

"I was wondering when you'd bring that up," Nolan smiled playfully.

"So spill it. How do you know?" House was piqued.

"I know because she and I talked week before last."

"About me?" House was agitated.

"Yes. I talked to her about you but not like you might think," Nolan interjected. "She called me to check on you after learning about your leg pain escalating."

"Foreman?"

"Yes, Doctors Foreman, and Taub and apparently Hadley have all mentioned to Dr. Cuddy you're in more pain lately."

House stared at Nolan. "Chase didn't say anything?"

"Nope, at least not that Dr. Cuddy mentioned," Nolan confirmed. "If your staff noticed you're in more pain, you must be or else you're faking it….which I highly doubt."

"It does hurt more these days," House admitted.

"Why do you think that is?" Nolan asked gently.

"I don't know. You tell me. Why is my leg hurting so much?"

"It could be a number of things, Greg. For example, it could be because there are actual physical issues going on or it could be that you're transferring emotional pain to your leg. What do you think about that?" Nolan watched House closely for a reaction.

"You're trying to tell me I'm lovesick?" House said sarcastically. "Seriously? Come on!"

"It's a theory."

"So exactly how does this prove Cuddy won't fire my ass?" House demanded.

Nolan glanced down and tried to hide his smile from House's scrutiny. "It's so obvious, Greg. She is in love with you."

House snorted and rolled his eyes. "You call that proof? Did you get your diploma out of a crackerjack's box? How the hell is that proof?"

"Did I mention I asked her?" Nolan smirked.

House paused at the comment. "Wait, you asked Cuddy if she'd fire me?"

"Not exactly," Nolan replied. "I asked her if she'd ever fire you for something you'd do outside of a medical situation." House held his breath awaiting an answer.

"Of course, she is a complete professional and she told me she wouldn't." Nolan said calmly.

"So, I have a … 'get-out-of-jail-pass?'"

"Depends on what you try to pull on her, but yeah, I suppose you do."

House smiled to himself and rubbed his scruffy chin. "And you believe her?"

"Shouldn't I?" Nolan challenged.

"She tried to fire me for telling a full lobby we'd slept together," House reminded.

"True. But you were lying about her and if I recall accurately, you didn't get fired for that exactly….more like it was about rebuffing her concerns about said lobby declaration and asking her to move in with you while she was trying to explain how she felt."

"Oh, yeah." House murmured.

"So, you don't want to be just friends, right?" Nolan brought the conversation back to its original key point. "What do you intend to do about it?"

"Not sure just yet," House said slowly. "Any ideas?"

"Plenty but this is about you, not me," Nolan grinned.

"I'm open to suggestions, you know."

"But that would be defeating the purpose of these sessions, don't you think?"

"Okay…." House paused for what seemed to be an indeterminate period of time. Nolan worked at not fidgeting. He knew House was considering something new.

"So what do you think would happen," House paused, "if I went to Cuddy's home and …."

"And what?"

"I don't know, that's as far as I get each time I think about this."

"Interesting," Nolan murmured.

"I'm allowed to fantasize, aren't I?"

"Sure. So what happens next in this fantasy?"

"Uh, Lucas answers the door and I punch him in the throat! He falls down and I jab him in the nuts with my cane. Cuddy sees he's a wus and she doesn't move. I grab her and kiss her and she kisses me back."

"Interesting symbolism," Nolan mulls the imagery. "You envision hurting his manhood to get him out of your way, then Cuddy responds to you, is that right?"

"Now you make it sound stupid," House pouted.

"You think physically overpowering Lucas will impress Cuddy?"

"Forget it." House looked dejected.

"I think you're going to have to actually resort to words rather than physicality," Nolan said as he got up to refill his coffee cup. "You want a cup?"

"Yeah, thanks." House waited for Nolan to bring him a cup.

"Have you ever thought what it must be like for Dr. Cuddy?" Nolan said after handing House a full cup of steaming black coffee.

"What do you mean?"

"What it must be like to care personally and deeply about someone who is also an employee?" Nolan said carefully

"What's your point?"

"My point is that if Dr. Cuddy has feelings for you, she can't do a thing about it without jeopardizing both her job and yours."

"So I have to make the first move?"

"Pretty much. Besides, didn't you tell me she's already let you know she was interested? If I recall correctly, you did molest her at that moment, right? You grabbed her breast to humiliate her if my memory serves…" Nolan glanced at House who was redfaced.

"I wasn't …I …I'm not proud of myself. I screwed up," House admitted.

"Yes you did, but you were …well, close to losing it," Nolan agreed. "No wonder she's rather skitterish around you."

"You think she's afraid to set me off?" House looked shocked.

"It's possible. You can't expect her to make a first move anymore. Those days are over."

"So it's up to me?"

"Of course. If you don't do something, she's going to keep moving on with her life. You haven't exactly given her a reason to do anything differently, have you?" Nolan said abruptly.

"Like what?"

"Like making her choose you over Lucas."

House was perplexed. "Exactly how do I do that?"

"You're asking me? I thought you were the diagnostician who could figure out most puzzles," Nolan smirked smugly. "Cuddy's the only puzzle you haven't yet figured out? Tsk, tsk, Greg."

"Man, you're really a prick aren't you," House said sternly.

"Takes one to know one," Nolan reminded him. "Stop wallowing in self-pity and distractions and think about it. If you can't figure out how to do it, maybe you never were meant to be together. Think it over and do something."

"I love her," House admitted.

"I figured. She doesn't know that, does she?" Dr. Nolan was shocked inwardly that House would admit such a deep feeling so readily.

"Of course not."

"Why do you say that? What do you mean of course not?"

House didn't say anything. His silence spoke volumes.

"What would happen if you told her?" Nolan asked carefully.

"She wouldn't believe me," House admitted.

"Why?"

"She just wouldn't," House said with some difficulty.

"Because mindgames are foreplay, am I right?" Nolan guessed.

"It was our 'thing.'" House stared up at his psychiatrist, "But then it kind of stopped."

"After you returned from Mayfield?"

"Yeah." House blushed in embarrassment.

"So now you have to be a little more direct," Nolan urged. "Ever thought of just telling her straight out what you're feeling? 

"God, no!" House recoiled at the thought.

"Afraid of the outcome?"

"Hey, I have been far from subtle with her. Cuddy knows I want to be with her," House declared.

"Do you actually know how women's minds work?" Nolan said sarcastically. "Women want you to be clear about your intentions."

"What more do I have to tell her?" House asked

"Well, from Cuddy's point of view, you don't want her to be with Lucas. You want to be with her. You want her to move in with you and live like a couple. Problem is she's got a child to parent and you've not said word one about where Rachel fits in. You've left that rather nebulous and Cuddy needs to hear from you about her daughter's role in your lives."

"Oh." House seemed surprised.

"Have you thought about Rachel, how you'd deal with her if you pursue Cuddy?"

"Uh…"

Nolan didn't say a word. He waited for House to finish the thought.

"Rachel is a part of Cuddy. I know Cuddy's world revolves around that little girl," House admitted.

"Seems to me that if you want to win Cuddy's heart, you're going to have to face up to the fact she's a mother and no matter what you say, hope or want, Cuddy is biologically programmed to put her daughter first over any man. Can you deal with that?"

"Seems to me its because of Rachel that Cuddy chose Lucas," House said astutely.

Nolan sat back and mulled over House's latest comment. "You're right. Lucas has it all. He's younger, more energetic, accepting and willing to play daddy to Rachel. You're kind of screwed, aren't you?"

"Kids like me just fine," House reacted.

"Because you're one of them," Nolan laughed.

"So, you're telling me Cuddy can't see me as a potential mate unless I can be a potential father figure?"

"He can be taught!" Nolan said theatrically. "You're catching on, doc.'

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_**Readers, Thank you for all the reviews! And the ideas! I don't know if you're as nervous about the finale but tonight's episode blew my mind with House's admitting he wanted to be more than friends with Cuddy. Lets see what options that brings to his words and deeds. Your reviews inspire and cause me to "feel the love and respond with updates!"**_


	4. Chapter 4 A Preoccupied Cuddy

"Dr. Cuddy!" House bellowed across the lobby.

Cuddy halted immediately and stiffened, worried what he might say next.

"Want to have lunch?" House asked her as he neared Cuddy.

Cuddy turned and squinted at House as if she was annoyed. "I…"

"Great. I'll stop by at noon," House said as he glided past her and into the clinic. Cuddy stared at the back of his head as he disappeared around the in-take desk.

Cuddy's mouth hung open. She closed it and glanced around to see who might have noticed the exchange. Nurse Jeffrey unsuccessfully tried to hide a smile. Cuddy frowned and spun on her heel as she hurried off to her office.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

11:58 am. Dr. Cuddy stared at her computer screen growing wary as the minutes ticked toward noon. A minute earlier than expected, House blasted into her office. "Ready?"

Cuddy glanced up at him. House looked happy and relaxed. "Uh…okay. Am I paying?"

"Nope, not today," House replied as he opened her office door and held it out of her way to pass by him.

Cuddy raised her eyebrows and glanced at House in surprise. "After you," House commented. Cuddy led the way after leaving her wallet in her purse.

House admired her figure as he followed her. She seemed to sense it and waited for him to catch up. "So what did you want to meet about?" Cuddy asked as they waited for the lobby elevator.

"Do I need a reason to ask you to lunch?" House asked pleasantly.

"No…I guess not," Cuddy said haltingly.

"Can't a couple of friends have lunch together now and then?" House added.

"I thought you didn't want to be friends," Cuddy said pointedly. She was staring at his profile as they stepped into the elevator and the doors closed.

"Not exactly, Cuddles. What I _implied_ was I didn't want to be _just _friends."

Cuddy looked away as the intensity of the moment caught her by surprise. The elevator doors opened and Cuddy hurried out. House smiled at her response. She was unnerved and he was in control -- for now.

"Starving?" House asked her teasingly.

Cuddy realized she was several paces ahead of House. "I'm sorry, I've just had too much coffee…expresso actually. Tends to make me speed up when I've had too much caffeine." Cuddy smiled weakly. House smiled a little too knowingly.

"You look like you've lost weight, Cuddy. The suit's looking a little loose on you," House said gently. Cuddy blushed as she realized House was studying her body.

"I can't tell if you're trying to be nice or not," Cuddy replied slightly sarcastically.

"I just noticed you're getting a little skinny – problems at home?"

Cuddy stopped and stared at him. "No. I'm fine. We're fine. I've been so busy…uh…whatever." She rolled her eyes and shook her head slightly.

House reached out and grabbed a dish of peach cobbler and placed it on Cuddy's tray."

"You know you love it, just enjoy it," House said as he grabbed a second dish and placed it on his own tray.

Cuddy smiled a little at the realization that House had remembered her favorite dessert.

"Live a little, Cuddles. Try something besides a salad," House gestured at the baked potatoes drizzled full of cheese. "Don't make me force-feed you!"

Cuddy tried to protest as House placed a large baked potato her tray. She gave up and let him win the argument.

"Why the sudden concern in my eating habits?" Cuddy asked after House paid the cafeteria cashier.

"Like I said, you're getting skinny and it's totally interfering with my fantasies. Can't have the 'girls' withering away!" House flirted. Cuddy squinted at him disapprovingly and led the way to a booth. House stared at her hips swaying as he followed her at a safe distance. House took his place across the table from her and watched her closely. Cuddy felt his stare and looked up.

"What?" Cuddy sounded slightly annoyed.

"Nothing. I'm enjoying the view, so sue me."

Cuddy blushed and studied her potato. The melted cheddar looked delicious.

"Life's short. Eat dessert first," House advised as he started in on his peach cobbler. "Don't tell me you'd rather eat the potato over warm peaches!"

Cuddy laughed a little and slid her peach cobbler over to nibble on it first.

"How's Rachel?" House asked Cuddy. She practically choked on the peach cobbler.

"She's fine," Cuddy gasped between sips of water. "What's with the sudden interest in my daughter?"

"Honestly?" House leaned in conspiratorially. Cuddy couldn't help but lean in. "_You're _nuts about Rachel so she must be pretty special. I figure if she's important to you, she's important to me." Cuddy looked stunned and was rendered speechless for a few seconds.

"Oh." Cuddy took a bite of the cobbler and stared at House. "Is this some sort of game?"

House took a bite and playfully pulled the fork out of his mouth slowly. "Nope."

"Really?" Cuddy said sarcastically.

"Really." House looked intensely into Cuddy's pale blue eyes.

"What's going on, House? What are you up to?" Cuddy's mood was growing sour.

House reached over with his fork and speared a chunk of peach out of Cuddy's cobbler dish and brought it up to her lips to bite. Cuddy's mouth dropped open at the overly familiar gesture, the perfect reaction allowing House the opportunity to slip the fork into her mouth and causing her to blush furiously.

"Good, isn't it?" House said with double meaning. Cuddy was speechless. House slid out of the booth and quickly came around to sit next to Cuddy in the booth.

"What are you doing?!"

"Sitting next to you!" House mocked her gently. His smile seemed kind instead of sarcastic.

"You're creeping me out," Cuddy whispered tersely to him. House ignored her and slid closer, placing his arm on the booth's ledge directly behind her. Cuddy noticed and leaned away from him a little.

"Cuddy, what's going on?"

Cuddy squinted at him. "What do you mean?"

House's knee rubbed against her knee under the table causing Cuddy to pause mid-sentence.

"I care about you, Cuddy. Really. I'm not playing a mindgame with you. You're getting rather thin and I'm concerned something is wrong, if not here at the hospital, then at home."

Cuddy heard House's gentle tone and felt herself relaxing a little in his presence. "I'm fine, really. I appreciate your concern but …"

"But what?" House said gently as he reached over to move her hair out of her eyes. The gesture was too intimate and Cuddy turned away to stare at her lunch. House realized he had gotten too demonstrative and dropped his hand letting it rest on her back. She stiffened. House stiffened a second later.

"I can feel your ribs, Cuddy!" House added swiftly. Cuddy looked mortified.

"Let me out," Cuddy implored him. "I need to go. This is …is…I need to go." House realized he had struck a nerve and that Cuddy was getting upset.

"Alright, here…" House moved out of the booth and watched Cuddy slip out quickly. "What's the matter, Cuddy?"

"Nothing. Everything's fine." Cuddy said as she gave him a quick fake smile and hurried away. House was perplexed. He knew he was making her slightly uncomfortable but nothing that would cause her to react so fiercely.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Not now! I'm on the phone with a patient!" Wilson whispered as he covered the phone receiver. House walked over and hit the button disconnecting the call. Wilson sighed loudly.

"Something's wrong with Cuddy." House declared as he took a seat on Wilson's couch.

"What now?" Wilson said in a jaded tone. "What's the latest emergency?"

"You haven't noticed?" House asked.

"Noticed what?" Wilson didn't really want to get involved in House's latest mind-screwing but there was no real escape.

"Cuddy's lost weight."

"So?"

"So?! She's lost weight and when I pointed it out, she acted weird about it."

Wilson glared at his friend. "Maybe she acted weird because you're checking out your _boss's _body????"

"Wilson, pay attention! Something's off and Cuddy's upset. She's lost weight and didn't act like a typical woman should when someone notices a weight loss. What do you know about things at home?"

Wilson rolled his eyes and wiped his face before staring at House. "I haven't a clue."

"Something's wrong in Paradise. I need to know."

"Have you ever thought of asking her?" 

"I did…at lunch…today." Wilson's eyes bulged.

"You had lunch with Cuddy? Cool!" Wilson looked genuinely happy. "What did she say?"

"She didn't say anything, that's why _we're_ talking about it." House snapped as he gestured between himself and Wilson.

"What do you think is causing Cuddy's sudden weight loss?" James sounded genuinely worried.

"It could be anything," House admitted. "It could be a symptom of something health-wise but more likely it has something to do with loverboy, Lucas."

"Or Rachel?" Wilson volunteered.

"Yeah but more likely Lucas."

"Why do you think that?" Wilson was confused.

"I don't know but nothing else makes sense," House admitted. He got up and left abruptly leaving Wilson confounded and worried.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Have you found out the cause of her weight loss?" Dr. Nolan prodded House.

"Yeah."

"And you don't want to tell me?" Dr. Nolan pursued.

"I'm not sure how to say this exactly," House said slowly. Dr. Nolan stayed silent awaiting House's next response.

"I think she's unhappy."

"Why do you think that?"

"I don't know, it's just a hunch."

"So you have no proof, evidence, symptoms…just a hunch?" Dr. Nolan asked a little blatantly.

"She's tired lately."

"Think it's a medical issue?" Dr. Nolan grew concerned.

"No, more likely because she's just not eating."

"Is that why you gave her the expresso machine? To perk her up, so to speak?" Nolan wondered aloud.

"Maybe."

"Have you tried taking her out to lunch, see if she's eating at all?"

"Funny you should mention that," House said quietly. "I asked her to lunch fully intending to put the moves on her and see how she responded but somewhere along the way I realized something else was bothering her."

"What do you mean? What happened?"

"I laid my hand on her back and could feel her ribs!" House replied.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. Of course she didn't like me getting so close in her personal space but it sort of freaked me out," House admitted.

"Are you concerned she's ill?"

"No, I don't think that's it. I think it's something emotional that's causing it."

"Like an eating disorder?"

"God, no. Cuddy's too smart for that. She's a vegetarian and a yogini. She's not going to harm her body out of some misplaced sense of vanity."

Nolan smiled slightly.

"What?" House asked.

"You know a lot about her. Uh…Yogini?"

"It's the female version of a yogi, sort of a tough, outspoken woman blah blah blah…" House mocked himself a little.

"Have you talked to Lucas about Cuddy?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

"He's no help. He said she was just overworked and made it sound like it was my fault Cuddy was so worn out and thin. Fucker."

Nolan hid his smirk at House's outburst. "You sure she's lost weight? You're not just obsessing or anything right?"

"I'm telling you she's swimming in her clothes. She's still pretty hot but she's seriously thin."

"So what are you going to do about it?"

"I could kidnap her and force-feed her cheesecake but that might get me arrested."

Nolan patted House's arm, "Why not bring her a cheese cake?"

"She doesn't like cheese cake. Peach cobbler is her favorite." House murmured.

Nolan noticed House's comment and marveled a little at the details that eked out at every session.

"So bring her a peach cobbler," Nolan suggested. "Then just talk to her and don't get in her personal space. See if she'll open up to you."

House nodded. "What if I'm the reason she's not eating?"

"Hmmmm," Nolan replied. "You'll have to figure out that one for yourself, Greg. Just follow her lead and see what she wants to talk about."

"Next week, same time, same place?" House asked as he stood up and walked to the door.

"Okay. See you next week, Greg. And good luck. Call me if you need to talk before then, okay?"

"Okay," House said firmly as he closed the door behind himself.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_**Hope you're enjoying the story so far. Can't believe we only have a couple more new episodes before the season is over. Lets hope House and Cuddy realize what we all know. They should be together! Reviews rock so please review. Thanks.**_


	5. Chapter 5 What hides beneath

Once Rachel fell asleep, Cuddy quietly headed to her bedroom and prepared for bed. She glanced at herself in the dresser mirror and realized House was right. She had lost weight. A significant percentage if her ribs were any indication poking out of her slender torso and her hip bones protruding above the edge of her lace-trimmed panties.

Cuddy walked into the bathroom and stepped on the scale and held her breath. She had lost nearly 11 pounds in two weeks. Without trying.

She bit her lip. She knew her lack of appetite was due to nerves. It was the sole reason she'd lost the weight. Cuddy realized she'd have to force herself to eat or face up to the decision she didn't want to make.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Lucas slipped into bed an hour later. He had quietly entered her room and disrobed before slipping in between the sheets and sliding over to her. Cuddy pretended to be asleep as his hands roamed over her body, gently moving beneath her baby doll pajamas and caressing her skin. His hand stopped moving suddenly. Cuddy wondered if he had noticed her weight loss by sheer touch. Lucas tried to stifle a sneeze unsuccessfully before his hands began roaming over her again immediately after.

"Good night, baby," Lucas whispered into the nape of her neck. Cuddy stayed silent playing the role of the dutiful sleeping girlfriend.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"You're still up?" Wilson asked House as he opened the kitchen cabinet to get a glass.

"Obviously," House groused back from the kitchen table.

"Can't sleep?" Wilson continued.

"Preoccupied."

"Cuddy?" 

"So," House glanced at Wilson. "She's got a secret and its eating at her."

"Don't women lose weight at first when they experience morning sickness?" Wilson said carelessly.

House snapped his head around to face Wilson. "You think she's…pregnant?" House looked horrified.

"I don't know."

"Then why on god's earth would you even suggest such a shitty thing?" House practically yelled.

"Hey, I thought we were starting up a differential!" Wilson defended himself. He couldn't help himself. He wanted House to react and do something before Cuddy ended up married and permanently gone from House's chances for happiness.

"Don't ever go there …understand me!?" House looked steamed.

"Fine." Wilson drank the glass of water to hide his smirk at House's obvious feelings for Cuddy. The guy would sulk around the edges of her life rather than take a stand and do something to win her away from Lucas. Wilson felt justified in provoking House a little.

"I'm going to bed. Don't stay up worrying about it all night," Wilson added as he headed down the hall.

House mumbled something terse and headed to his room. He layed down on his bed and stared up at the darkness. "God, what if she was pregnant by him?" House whispered aloud. He shut his eyes tightly and willed the idea out of his head. It didn't work. House flipped over and stared at the light blue angular numbers on his digital clock. He'd stare unseeingly as he mulled over possibilities to such quick weight loss. Every concept kept returning to nerves, at least based on the lack of other symptoms.

House turned his back to the clock and let himself dream about her. Cuddy smiling at him. Kissing her, holding her. Imagining her in his bed curled up beside him. He wondered what she was wearing in her bed at that exact moment and refused to let Lucas slip into his pseudo-dream state. He decided she'd be wearing a pale little pajama set he got to see her in when he visited her bedroom window one night after figuring out the puzzle of the patient locked in a vegetative state in a wheelchair.

He remembered how lovely she looked as she brought him a towel, the light from her side table lamp illuminated her figure making her clothing almost translucent. House drifted off into sleep smiling at the memory.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Cuddy forced herself to buy the highest calorie yogurt she could find in the cafeteria. She snagged a frosted cupcake instead of a bran muffin and hurried to her office. She decided against the expresso this morning. The last thing she needed was a faster metabolism. The cupcake did taste great but she had to literally force herself to swallow the food. "Think happy thoughts, Lisa!" She told herself out loud. She stared at Rachel's framed photo and relaxed enough to finish the cupcake and open the cup of yogurt.

She had gotten about halfway through it when House burst into her office bright and early.

"Good morning, sunshine!" House said lightly. "I bring you calories shaped like donuts!" He hoisted the small white paper bag jauntily and waved it before her. "Cream-filled donuts, guaranteed to put a few pounds back on that lovely derriere of yours."

Cuddy tried to frown at him but found herself a mix of emotions. Happy to see he cared about her, was actually thoughtful and worried about her. It was a new experience and one she felt slightly pleased by.

"I just ate breakfast," Cuddy admitted. "I couldn't eat another bite."

"Sorry but I bought these for you. Two donuts, one for each 'sweet cheek'!" House wiggled his eyebrows lasciviously.

"Fine. Leave them here. I'll eat them later."

"Not so fast, Twiggy. I'll just wait around until you polish these off."

"House! I have things to do!"

"So eat. Mangez!" House leaned back and twirled his cane expectantly. Cuddy sighed and looked into the bag. He had brought her chocolate-covered, cream-filled donuts.

She reached in gingerly and pulled out the gooey donut. It smelled delicious.

"You're going to sit there and watch me eat?" Cuddy asked him incredulously.

"Want me to close my eyes?"

Cuddy frowned and ignored him. She bit into the puffy pastry and moaned a little as the sweet tastes exploded in her mouth.

"I can't sit here with my eyes closed if you're going to make pornographic sounds like that!" House teased her. "Pretty good, huh?"

"Very good," Cuddy admitted. "You want some?"

"Are we still talking about donuts?" House said suggestively.

"Of course," Cuddy tried to sound annoyed.

"Then, no." House looked around her office. Cuddy studied him as she finished the first donut. She knew she had to eat it or he'd never leave her office. She was thankful the donut was rather small.

"So, you okay?" House asked her quietly. Cuddy glanced up at him.

"Of course."

"Are you pregnant or suddenly anorexic?" House quipped. Cuddy practically spit out the donut as she struggled not to choke.

"Why on earth would you ask that?"

"I thought maybe morning sickness might be the cause of your sudden weight loss. And you haven't answered my question." House pointed out.

"Not that it's any of your business but no, I'm not pregnant. I don't have morning sickness and I'm perfectly fine," Cuddy glared at House across her desk. "And it's a bit late in the game to become suddenly anorexic, don't you think?"

"Okay, then," House stood up and glanced into the donut bag. "You still have one more to eat." Cuddy shook her head.

"I would if I could. They're delicious, really, but I'm full. Honestly."

House hesitated. "You know, you can talk to me about anything, Cuddy. You know that, right? Even about Lucas, if you need to."

Cuddy was surprised by the level of his concern for her. She wanted to believe him, that this wasn't some sort of mind game but she knew it would only come back to bite her.

"Thanks, House, but I'm fine, really." Cuddy stood up and came around her desk to get a glass of water to flush out the taste of sugar overload. House watched her and stepped into her path. He reached for her hand and held it for a second.

"You're sure?" House asked her as he stared intently into her eyes. Cuddy was taken aback by the simple sweet gesture. "You'd tell me if you weren't, right?"

"Of course I would, just as you'd tell me if your leg pain got worse, right?" Cuddy deflected.

"Of course," House nodded. He squeezed her hand gently and let it go. "See you later, Cuddles."

Cuddy watched as House turned away and left her office. She could never bring herself to discuss Lucas with House. She'd talked about House to Lucas once and Lucas managed to spill that secret and hurt House, fraying the trust between them. _No way_, she thought. _And that goes for Wilson, too_, Cuddy decided.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

For nearly a week now, she'd find a small white bag on her desk with a couple of donuts waiting for her. She knew House had brought them for her. Cuddy would make the effort to eat at least one but it wasn't easy to do. She began noticing House hovering around the front desk and inside the clinic. Was he spying on her? Watching over her? Cuddy didn't know for sure but she appreciated his donut gesture and the fact she didn't have to badger him to fulfill his clinic hours.

House kept his distance, something she appreciated as well after the odd way he acted with her over lunch the previous week. Looking back on it, she realized he was feeling awkward about it too. Did he invite her to lunch to inspect her eating habits out of the blue? Or was it House being just plain concerned about her? She had so little experience with House being… well, _nice_ and attentive. Whatever it was, it certainly was awkward and House hadn't made a move to be near her since then.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

House indeed was hovering around Cuddy's "space." He wasn't going to give up until he learned what was preoccupying her mind and the cause of her weight loss. He hoped she had been telling him the truth about the possibility of being pregnant. That thought haunted him more than all others and made it almost impossible to look at her without feeling intense possessiveness.

House sat at his desk ignoring the emails and memos he was supposed to be reviewing. How had it come to this? He and Cuddy use to be close but once she hooked up with Lucas it was as if she had no time for him and worse, no desire to be around him.

It was quiet in the hospital as the early evening stretched into night. House didn't feel like returning to the apartment and hearing Wilson and Sam cooing at each other all night long. House got up and maneuvered over to his leather chair and got comfortable, settling in for a long think about his favorite subject: Cuddy.

He closed his eyes and let his mind wander for a while. He reviewed the week's worth of run-ins involving her. He smiled at the thought of her finding the donuts on her desk each morning and sampling them privately. It felt nice to be nice to her. In fact, since he returned from Mayfield he had done everything in his power to show her only kindness and at worst, bluntness. He no longer felt the need to strike out at her emotionally, to hurt her. Was it because Lucas was there for her to run to if House did hurt her feelings? Nope. It just wasn't in him to be ugly to her.

Why couldn't she see that? Cuddy had become fairly guarded during their "chats," almost as if she fully expected House to try to hurt her feelings like he had over the years.

"Why _did_ I do that to you?" House mumbled.

"Do what to whom?" Cuddy's voice cut through the silence. House's eyes flew open to see Cuddy staring at him from the doorway, the door resting against her shoulder.

"Talking to yourself?" Cuddy smiled at him.

"It's a coping technique," House said quickly.

"Oh, well then I've been coping for years!" Cuddy teased pleasantly.

"Why are you here so late?" House asked lamely.

"Work, what else?" Cuddy replied. House straightened up in his chair a little.

"Come in," House gestured to the ottoman for Cuddy to have a seat. She smiled slightly and came in as he asked and sat next to his foot on the ottoman. "To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"

Cuddy seemed pleased by his comment and stalled momentarily. "I dropped off some files for Wilson and saw you were still here. Why are_ you_ still here?"

"Avoiding Wilson and Sam. Besides, a man can relax here once everyone has gone home for the night." House bantered easily with her. He studied her face. She looked tired and thin but still undeniably beautiful. "Sure _you're_ not avoiding something at home?"

Cuddy's smile disappeared. "Of course not." She moved to get up but House leaned forward and grasped her hand.

"What's going on, Lisa?" House asked her bluntly. Calling her by her first name unnerved her.

"House, I'm fine."

"If you say so," House said still holding her hand. He glanced down at her hand in his. It looked right.

"Do you love him?" House asked bluntly. Cuddy tried to pull her hand back but House held it tightly. "Lucas. Do you love him?"

Cuddy's defiant eyes glared at him. She refused to play.

"House, let go of my hand." Cuddy said firmly. House did as she asked but his other hand never left her shoulder. "Please don't toy with me, House. I can't take it anymore."

"Why would you think that?"

"Because it's what you do, House."

"I'm not the same guy I was before Mayfield," House reached up and lifted her chin to make her look at him. Her eyes flickered quickly away from his. "Or haven't you noticed?"

Cuddy didn't say anything.

"We belong together."

"Don't do this to me, House." Cuddy whispered. Her eyes looked so sad, her bottom lip trembled.

"Leave him, Lisa," House urged her. "Leave him for me, for us."

At that moment she knew she wanted to leave Lucas for House but reality hit hard and she felt the same old fear settling across her brain. "For what? Us?"

"Yes, for us!" House said quickly. "This isn't a game. I'm in love with you!" Cuddy stared into House's eyes.

"You mean it?" Cuddy couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Of course I mean it."

The lights flicked on suddenly and House's eyes flew open in the brightness.

"Oh, you're still here. I'll come back later to clean up," the janitor was clearly startled to find House alone in his office asleep in his chair. The empty fifth of bourbon bottle sat on his desk.

"Yeah, okay." House felt sick suddenly. It was a damn dream. All this time it was just a dream. Cuddy was likely home and in the arms of that son of a bitch, Lucas. On the bright side, a dream was definitely an improvement over a hallucination. House mopped his face with his hands and struggled to get up. He threw on his jacket, grabbed his backpack and walked out of his office, leaving the lights on for the janitor's return.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_**Do you hate this? What else can we expect but for House to want her and hope she'll come to him but she's just too afraid to. Why? I'll try to answer that in the next chapter depending upon the reviews – hint, hint! More reviews and comments inspire faster updates. Please take a second to throw your thoughts at me! And, thanks for reading.**_


	6. Chapter 6 Friendship is underrated

_**Thank you, you wonderful readers, for taking the time to read the story and leave such kind reviews. They are so rewarding and it makes updating the story all the more enjoyable. Thanks again and please keep reviewing as the chapters come up.**_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"You're sure it was a dream, not an hallucination?" Dr. Nolan said firmly. He stared at House waiting confirmation.

"I went nuts, not stupid," House said gruffly. "_Yes_, it was _just_ a dream. The janitor woke me up when he turned on the lights."

Nolan nodded in agreement. "Okay, okay. I understand your point. I think the dream revealed some very important concerns about Dr. Cuddy's relationship with you."

"Uh, correction there, Doc. There is no relationship with Dr. Cuddy. She's hooked up with that loser Lucas and I don't see it ending anytime soon." House glared at his glass of water on the table in front of him. If looks could kill, that glass would have shattered on the spot.

"You don't see the clues in your dream?" Nolan seemed amused.

"What are you talking about?" House let his head fall backwards as he closed his eyes.

"I'm talking about the fact that in your dream you realized Dr. Cuddy can't bring herself to trust you because she's afraid of the 'old' you, the one that 'toyed' with her when she was open with you," Dr. Nolan explained almost painfully slowly.

"Okay."

"That's it? Okay?" Nolan was sounded a bit annoyed.

"Okay! I get it. Cuddy doesn't believe I've changed. I haven't convinced her of that."

"So what do you intend to do about that?" Nolan provoked him a little too quickly.

"I don't know. I've made it clear I want to be more than friends and she doesn't say anything back," House bitched.

Nolan shifted in his chair, employing a waiting technique to see if House would offer more thoughts. The silence hung heavily over them.

"Yet she continues to try to offer you an olive branch of sorts. Am I right?" Nolan added carefully. "She wants to be friends."

"The Kiss of death."

"What else could she have said?" Nolan countered.

"Point well taken."

"You know, I'm a little surprised you've sat back this long and done essentially nothing to woo her away from Lucas," Nolan smiled broadly – practically goading House to react.

House refused the bait. "I'm not going to do that to her. I care about her and if she's happy, then I'm happy."

"But you're not. Happy, that is."

"True. But I'm not so sure she's all that happy either."

"Did you ever find out what was the reason behind her sudden weight loss?" Nolan watched House's face closely.

"No, but I know she's not pregnant and she's not anorexic."

"You asked her?" Nolan wasn't really surprised. House had changed but bluntness was there to stay. "Think she might be bulimic?"

"God, no!" House retorted. "Barfing is too vile for her to do voluntarily."

Nolan smiled at the remark. "I take it you think highly of her…outside of the romantic realm, I mean."

"Cuddy doesn't have an eating disorder. She doesn't eat much when she's stressed out." House smirked at the psychiatrist.

"What do you think has her so upset she's not eating?"

"Hell if I know. I've tried to figure that out but she won't open up."

"Ever wondered if _you_ might be the reason?" Dr. Nolan asked solemnly.

"I barely register as a blip on her radar these days," House groused. "I've brought her donuts everyday for well over a week and made sure she ate at least one every day. Cuddy's a sucker for chocolate boston-cream donuts."

"That's really sweet of you to do that, House." Nolan smiled approvingly.

"Yeah, whatever."

"You know, you really have been making great strides since our treatment began. For instance, I don't believe you've even mentioned once saying anything hurtful to Dr. Cuddy. As far as I can recall without reviewing my notes, it seems to me you've been going out of your way to be supportive, kind and even -- caring. Like the counsel you provided to her when Dr. Cuddy was renegotiating with the insurance company."

"So I'm not as big an ass as I use to be?"

"I'd dare say you're not an ass at all," Nolan remarked happily. "Dr. Cuddy may just be afraid to trust the new you. After all, you were quite mean to her at times."

House pondered the comments carefully. "What do I have to do to convince her I'm not…" House quickly gestured with air quotes as he continued, "toying with her?"

"You seem to know Lisa Cuddy very well. You know her favorite donut, favorite dessert, … what do you think she would want you to do?"

"If I knew _that _I wouldn't be asking you!"

"Well then that is a problem. But from where I sit, it sounds like you're waiting for her to decide between Lucas and you. Sound fair?" Nolan stood up and slid his hands into his pants pockets clearly trying to decide whether or not to continue on. "Of course, Cuddy may just be too stressed out to make that decision."

"So …what? Do I wait this out and let her have space or …step up and force her to make a choice? I mean Lucas practically lives with her…I don't see how…" House was muddled.

"Why would she make a choice when she doesn't know what the options are?" Nolan pointed out. House stared at him.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, on one hand, Cuddy has a nice steady boyfriend in this Lucas fellow. But on the other hand she has you but there's no 'there' there. ..without any promise of what there could be between you." Nolan studied his own wedding band momentarily. "Dr. Cuddy knows you don't want a relationship according to your very own words yet here you are asking her to leave a relationship to be with you. So I guess what I'm saying is what do you mean when you tell her you want to be more than friends?"

"We haven't gotten that far in our little tete-a-tetes," House volunteered.

"Maybe you should figure out if you have something to offer her that would make it worth leaving Lucas for. Women are cagey because we make them feel insecure by keeping our emotions bottled up."

"Oh." House realized.

"So think about what it is you want from her. Do you want Cuddy in your life or do you just not want her to be with someone else? The latter is fairly selfish and cruel to her, …and to you, too," Nolan pointed out.

House shifted around in the chair and paused before speaking. "She deserves to be happy but if I force the issue, she'll chose Lucas. Or worse, she'll choose me and then I'll make her miserable."

"Why do you say that?" Nolan appeared worried. "I doubt you'd make her miserable. In fact, I think you two might just be perfect for each other….all this pushing and pulling back and forth over the years."

"Seriously?" House sounded a little hopeful.

"Look, Greg. You're my patient. I only want what's best for you to live a healthy, happy life. It sounds to me like Lisa Cuddy is the key. You want to be with her. She might want to be with you, too, but I don't blame her for being skitterish. You'll win her over if you show her what she can have if she chooses you."

"What are you saying? 

"I'm saying be your new and improved self. Let her know she can trust you not only at work but outside the hospital, too. Maybe your friendship is what she truly needs most right now. Don't withhold it from her. Cuddy is trying to reach out to you. Don't withdraw. Reach out to her and let her know you're there for her, too."

House mulled over the advice. He didn't know how to respond verbally. He wanted to yell that it was unfair to make him endure the agony of friendship only when he was in love with the woman. Finally, House nodded and checked his watch.

"Time's up. Next week?"

Nolan nodded back and smiled at the lovesick man. "You'll get through this, Greg. I wouldn't ask you to do something that would harm your progress. Let me know if you need to talk or if things get too tough, okay?"

House nodded again and left preoccupied with many mixed emotions. He sat in his car in the Mayfield parking lot for several minutes before starting the car's engine. House aimed the car in the direction of Princeton and put the car on cruise control just before he felt his cell phone vibrate in his coat pocket. He planned to ignore it but recognized the ring tone was Cuddy calling. The woman had amazing timing.

"Helllllloooo, Cuddles." House worked to sound jaunty.

"House, I just got a call from Dr. Nolan." House was stunned. "House, is everything all right?" Cuddy sounded sad.

"Cuddy, you're adorable when you worry about me but I _am_ a big boy and I can take care of myself …with the help of a slightly chubby shrink."

"House…Dr. Nolan asked to meet with me this week. I wanted you to know – to hear it from me."

"I appreciate that, you're a… good friend," House managed to say gently. Cuddy caught the nuance and slowly released the breath she had been unconsciously holding in. "He probably just wants to get a good look at you, Cuddy."

"Why would you say that?" Cuddy was momentarily confused.

"Because I …we talk about you a lot," House said with a smile on his face. Cuddy could detect the smile.

"Right," Cuddy said sarcastically. House grinned. The banter was back.

"It's absolutely true."

"Let me guess….complaining about all the clinic hours I force you to do?" Cuddy chided back. House saw this as just the right opportunity to point out his good behavior.

"When have you had to force me?" House teased.

"Just last week! When my PA quit that morning? Remember?" Cuddy was beginning to relax a little.

"Uh, uh, uh, Cuddy. As I recall, Chase interrupted us…something to do with a case?"

"True. You got me there," House could hear the smile on Cuddy's face as she replied.

"When is Nolan meeting with you?" House was unnerved at the prospect.

"Friday morning."

"Okay. Thanks again for letting me know."

"You're welcome, House. How's your leg?"

"Not bad."

"The motrin's working?"

"That and physical therapy," House added. He neglected to admit the amount of alcohol he had been consuming to help dull the aches' intensity.

"Good. I'm glad. Are you planning on coming in today?"

"Of course, unless you'd like to play hooky with me?" House flirted. Cuddy tried not to smile.

"Let me think about it. No." Cuddy answered sarcastically -- clearly not thinking it over before deciding against it. House was slightly disappointed but not surprised. It wouldn't be like Cuddy to skip out on responsibilities. And then it hit him. Responsibilities. Cuddy needed to know he could be counted on to be responsible no matter how boring it might be or annoying.

"That offer for dinner still good?" House angled. Cuddy hesitated but agreed. "Good, see you later, Cuddy."

"Bye," Cuddy said softy before hanging up. House was conflicted. He was feeling pretty good about the opportunity to spend time with Cuddy and put the shrink's advice to work while at the same time he didn't like the surprising news of his boss meeting with his psychiatrist.

House snapped open his cell phone and punched a single digit bringing Nolan's number up on speed dial. No answer. The call went to voicemail and House punched past the canned recording of Nolan's calm voice to leave a terse message: "Nolan. It's House. Cuddy just called me about your meeting Friday. What the hell is that about? Call me."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dr. Nolan was impressed. Not only did Cuddy do what he expected her to do but House had also reacted as predicted. "All right, Dr. House and Dr. Cuddy. Friday should be fun."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_**Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Let me know if you think any of the conversations and behaviors are out of character. Please take a moment to review. They are wonderful to read and very kind. Hope you enjoy the story.**_


	7. Chapter 7 Dinner with Cuddy

For the first time in nearly a month, Cuddy felt a brief reprieve from the stomach churning stress that had stolen her appetite. She sat back in her leather chair and thought about her phone conversation with House. He had been surprisingly pleasant with her despite the news his psychiatrist wanted to confer with Cuddy.

Dr. Nolan had been fairly cryptic in his brief call and insisted it had to be this week. Cuddy was worried but House had managed to put her at ease. He even accepted her dinner invitation she'd offered a while ago. Maybe he was coming to terms with the way things were with Cuddy and Lucas. Or maybe he was just being nosy about her eating habits. She hadn't lost any more weight thanks to House's daily donuts delivery and a surprise pizza delivery to her office late one afternoon providing her with an all-veggie pizza that smelled as great as it tasted.

House was certainly being very kind to her. She felt she had to let him know about Nolan's call. It was the right thing to do and she couldn't live with herself if she hadn't.

House was a little anxious throughout the day after his session with Nolan. Nolan hadn't returned his call and House was angry at the thought his psychiatrist might be sharing concerns with his own boss.

It wasn't until 4:30 that House finally crossed paths with Cuddy in the hospital. He fell into step with the Dean as she left a budget meeting with the accounting department.

"Cuddles, are you still up for grabbing a bite tonight?" House asked. Cuddy was caught off guard but she managed to smile at House.

"Yes, absolutely!" Cuddy smiled genuinely at House who felt a small shiver travel up his back in anticipation.

"Where do you want to go?"

"You pick," Cuddy interjected.

"You _are_ still paying, right?" House quizzed her with a playful smile.

"Of course," Cuddy said with a sigh.

"Cool. Come see me when you're hungry," House said with an obvious waggle of his eyebrows. His flirtation obvious but still acceptable. Cuddy smiled and nodded. They split up as he headed to his office and she took the stairs to her office.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

About two hours later, Cuddy stopped into House's office. "Hey, want to get something to eat?" House glanced up at her casually. In reality he had been counting the minutes until she showed up. He had searched Google map to find a cool local eatery near the hospital that offered her favorite dishes, mainly vegetarian.

"Yeah. Now's good." House stood up and grabbed his cane and jacket and met her at the door. He held it open for her and she passed by. He felt excited for the first time in weeks.

"Where do you want to go?" Cuddy asked as they waited for the elevator.

"Uh…you like tabouleh? Vegetarian fare?" House mentioned casually. Cuddy smiled brightly.

"I love vegetarian! There's a great little place near…" Cuddy started to say as House grinned back at her.

"The Secret Garden?"

"That's it! Have you been there before?" Cuddy asked with a hint of surprise in her voice.

"God no, but I figured you might like it better than Sizzlers," House joked. Cuddy gave him her signature look and smiled back.

_He's being so thoughtful! _Cuddy thought to herself. She knew House's penchant for steaks but his suggestion to go vegetarian told her plenty. She stared at House's profile as they headed through the parking lot.

"Want to take your car or my bike?" House asked. By 'bike' House meant his motorcycle. Cuddy frowned.

"Mind if we take my car?" Cuddy gestured to her skirt and House nodded easily.

The ride was a little quiet as the pair struggled to fill the silence with chitchat.

"Sorry for turning down your invite last week," House said casually. Cuddy glanced over to study his profile. "It's just …" He let his thought trail off.

"It's just what?" Cuddy asked.

"It's just a little hard to get around the fact you're 'taken,'" House admitted. Cuddy pressed her lips together and was uncertain how to respond.

"But that doesn't mean we can't be friends. Right?" Cuddy asked nervously. House looked at her profile and grimaced at the answer he knew he had to give her.

"Right." House forced a smile as she glanced over at him. Cuddy smiled back.

"Well, friend, how's Rachel and Lucas?" House played the game.

"They're fine. Thanks for asking. Wilson said you moved out. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, it's fine, a little uncomfortable with Wilson and his ex streaking around the place so I moved back to my ole place."

Cuddy wondered if House felt pushed out of his living arrangements with Wilson.

"What's Sam like these days?"

"Hard to tell. She seems a little more mature, a little more wrinkled and she's…trying to …you know…to make it work with Wilson," House murmured.

"Think it will?"

"Who knows." House seemed a little distracted. "Maybe. I hope it does. He deserves to be happy."

Cuddy looked at House's profile and took notice of the softer expression on his face.

"What about you?" Cuddy asked.

"What about me?"

"You deserve to be happy, too," Cuddy said. "How are you doing?"

"I'd be a lot better if Lucas would suddenly turn gay but that's not likely to ever happen with his current girlfriend," House tried to kid.

Cuddy gave him her signature look and he smiled back at her. The moment felt electric.

"We're here," Cuddy stated as she pulled into the parking lot next to The Secret Garden restaurant. House watched Cuddy peripherally. He wanted to jump out of the car and race around it to open her car door but it would seem too courtly. Instead, he acted as casually as he could and tried to ignore the hard pounding of his heart against his rib cage.

The pair entered the restaurant and were led to a quiet table in the corner near the front window. After settling in, House took note of Cuddy's behavior. He watched her reactions as she read the menu, how she drank her water and looked for clues about her lacking appetite.

"Hungry?" House asked casually.

"Uh…a little."

"Good, I was starting to worry about you." House felt slightly naked at mentioning his actual concerns.

Cuddy glanced up and caught House staring at her. "I'm fine, House. I've just been a little preoccupied lately and …"

"Preoccupied? More like worried. I remember you don't eat when you're stressed out."

Cuddy blushed a little. She was caught.

"You know, if you mean it about us being friends, you can tell me what's bothering you," House urged. "I mean, if something is bugging you, I'm here for you."

Cuddy was touched. "That's really sweet of you, House. Thanks but I'm okay. Really."

"If you say so," House pretended to believe her. Cuddy studied her menu and House took the opportunity to study her. He could tell she wasn't interested in eating but now had to in front of him to prove she was 'fine.'

The waitress eventually brought the pair a bottle of red wine and two vegetarian dishes. House raised his glass to Cuddy and proposed a toast. Cuddy was relaxing more and more and was curious to see what he had to say.

"To old friends…with benefits!" House winked at her. Cuddy rolled her eyes and sipped her wine without clinking her glass to his. House grinned and took a large swallow.

The next hour passed comfortably. The couple enjoyed easy banter and discussed a little hospital gossip as they each stole looks at one another. House fought to keep his romantic feelings in check and play the 'friend.' Cuddy appreciated his manner and relaxed enough to share funny anecdotes about her daughter and her parents.

Eventually the evening had to end as Cuddy's cell phone rang to notify her that the sitter was leaving for the night now that Lucas had arrived home. Cuddy felt guilty and it showed. House realized she needed to go but he didn't want it to end. He signaled the waitress and asked her about the dessert menu. Cuddy wasn't interested but House knew better and ordered the tiramisu with two forks. Cuddy shot him a sarcastic look.

The dessert was fantastic and House made a show of enjoying it until Cuddy relented to taste it. House watched her closely. She took a small bite and allowed the lovely sweet softness to spread across her tongue as she closed her eyes. House loved how Cuddy indulged her senses.

"Good stuff, huh?" House cajoled. Cuddy smiled and put her fork down. "Oh, come on! You can't stop at just one bite!" House scooped up a large bite on his fork and aimed it at Cuddy's mouth. She refused it gently. He began making airplane noises as he 'buzzed' the forkful at her mouth. She laughed and he slipped the tiramisu between her lovely lips.

"No more!" Cuddy pleaded despite enjoying the last mouthful.

"there's plenty more where that came from!" House teased knowing the double-meaning wasn't lost on her. Cuddy blushed. She hadn't realized how intimate the gesture had been.

"Oh, wow, I have to get home before Rachel goes to bed," Cuddy said softly.

House realized Cuddy needed to go more so because of him rather than Rachel. "Yeah, me too. I do need to get my beauty sleep!"

Once on the road, House tried not to stare at Cuddy as she drove them back to the hospital.

"This was nice, House."

"It was. We should do this again soon," House suggested. Cuddy nodded. He loved the idea of spending time with the woman he loved even if he had to act almost like a 'girlfriend.'

"I'm glad we can be friends again," Cuddy said as she waited for House to exit the car next to his motorcycle.

"Yeah, me too." House replied despite his heart racing against his ribs. He wanted to grab her and kiss her softly and deeply. He knew if he stayed a moment longer in her Lexus he'd be all over her. "G'night Cuddy. Next time I'm paying."

"That'll be the day!" Cuddy said playfully as she rolled her eyes at him. House took the moment to angle for another meal together.

"Oh, really? You don't think I'll buy? Care to put your money where your mouth is?"

Cuddy squinted at House. "You're going to bet me money?"

"Absolutely, unless you care to pay up with something more interesting?" House waggled his eyebrows.

"Clinic hours?" Cuddy teased.

"Not interesting enough," House teased back.

"What are you getting at?"

"If you'll ride on my motorcycle to our next 'friends' meal, I'll pay. You can even pick the place, after all its your turn, right?" House had her where he wanted her.

Cuddy looked hesitant. "Yeah, okay. I'll take you up on your offer. I'll let you know the place and time. Deal?"

"Deal," House agreed before exiting her car. He headed back into the hospital to grab his backpack and keys. Cuddy waited and watched him saunter in to the hospital. His leg appeared to be functioning well as House moved quickly and without any obvious signs of pain.

"This was really nice," Cuddy murmured to herself before driving off to her daughter and boyfriend.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_**What do you think of the dinner with the two? House is trying hard to be a friend first to Cuddy despite his deeper feelings. Cuddy is trying to move past that yet keep their connection despite her new relationship with Lucas. Still, Cuddy hasn't told House what's the cause of her loss of appetite. Hmmmm. Reviews make me very happy and prolific in updates (hinty, hint hinterson!)**_


	8. Chapter 8 Nolan and Cuddy meet

**Thank you all for your wonderful reviews and comments. It is such a great feeling to know you like the story and are enjoying it. I hope you'll like this new chapter as it attempts to answer some of the questions and concerns many readers have mentioned. **

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

"You had dinner with House?" Lucas sounded more annoyed than surprised.

"I hadn't planned on it tonight but he caught me off guard," Cuddy replied as she changed into lounge pants and a camisole.

"So you planned it for some other night?" Lucas knew he sounded jealous. He was.

"Lucas, please. I tried to get him out of his office last week and offered to go get a bite nearby but he turned me down."

"Why did you do that?" Lucas sat on the bed more resigned than angry.

"House has changed. He's trying to be nice and I wanted to let him know I appreciated it. That and his leg seems to be hurting more and more according to his team. Then there's Wilson who's has been preoccupied with his ex-wife," Cuddy stopped in front of Lucas. "I felt bad for him so I asked him to join me last week when you were off working late."

"So is this going to be a regular thing with you two whenever I'm on a night job?" Lucas hid his anger.

"No, I told you before I am trying to repair our friendship. If I don't, it just makes work more stressful and I don't need that," Cuddy said plainly.

"Has he been stressing you out? Is that why you've lost weight 'cuz you've gotten pretty skinny, baby." Lucas leaned forward and took her hand in his and pulled her over to him. Lucas wrapped his arms around her waist and placed his face against her stomach. "Anything I can do to help your stress level?" Cuddy wondered if Lucas was hinting at sex. He was. She decided to play it off.

"Actually, I'm pretty tired and I wanted to spend a little time with Rachel before she's asleep."

"That's cool," a clearly disappointed Lucas mumbled against her stomach. "Go see her and I'll make you something to eat."

"I'm really not hungry…" Cuddy protested.

"Yeah, but you need to eat something, baby. You need to take care of yourself and if you won't then I will. Scoot." Lucas patted her bottom and grinned up at her. Cuddy smiled back and pulled away to go to Rachel's room. She couldn't help feeling like she was trying to avoid Lucas.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

"Sounds like your dinner went rather well, Greg." Dr. Nolan said prompted over the phone. "Did you find out what was the cause of Cuddy's weight loss?"

"No and that's not why I called to talk." House was annoyed and it was apparent.

"I'm guessing Dr. Cuddy informed you about my meeting request?"

"D'uh!"

"Relax, Greg. This has absolutely nothing to do with you. I promise."

"Okay then tell why you need to see Cuddy!" House was adamant.

"You really think I would tell her anything from our sessions? That would be supremely unethical on my part and extremely hurtful to you," Nolan countered.

"So you're not going to tell me why you're meeting with my boss?" House fought to sound calm.

"I will if you insist," Nolan said.

House rolled his eyes and tried not to yell at his shrink. "I insist."

"Fine. But you need to realize that trust is an issue for you. If you really want to know, I'll tell you. Ready?"

House hesitated. He knew this was a test but his curiosity was not easily waylaid.

"You just want to check her out, see if she's as hot as I said," House said weakly.

"Well, there is that," Nolan played along. "But seriously, this is a personal matter for me and truly has nothing to do with you. If it did, I would have told you in advance. I'm sorry I didn't realize Dr. Cuddy was so loyal to you and would notify you of my meeting request."

House was momentarily quiet as he held the cell phone to his cheek. He didn't know how to respond. Nolan was right. Cuddy had_ sided_ with House and told him upfront that Nolan was intent to meet with her, presumably about House.

"I get it, Greg, Dr. Cuddy's a looker. I'll try not to stare," Dr. Nolan teased.

"She's use to it by now, everybody stares at her. You'll see why soon enough," House mumbled, annoyed his curiosity was still unsated.

"I promise you, Greg, nothing about this meeting has anything to do with you," Nolan confirmed.

"Yeah, alright. I believe you."

"Good. I'll explain it all to you after I meet with Dr. Cuddy."

"Deal. Friday afternoon, call me." House said as he hung up. Nolan shook his head a little and tried not to laugh. House was starting to finally trust.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

House worked hard to stay out of Cuddy's path for the rest of the week. He wanted her to miss him, to _come_ see him. It was killing him. He'd find excuses to drift past her office to get a glimpse of her. She was always stunning no matter what she was wearing or doing. House knew his obsession was growing but he had no choice but to bury it from everyone but himself -- most of all, her. Their renewed friendship was at stake and he needed to be around her if only to be a constant reminder of her other options.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

"Dr. Cuddy, there's a Dr. Nolan here to see you," Nurse Jeffery stated once Cuddy picked up the line. "Should I show him to your office?"

"Thank you, Jeffrey," Cuddy answered quickly as she cleared her desk for House's psychiatrist's visit.

Within moments Dr. Nolan was seated comfortably before Cuddy's desk, all formalities addressed.

Dr. Nolan's eyes took in the infamous Dr. Cuddy. House was right. She was a total stunner: gorgeous from her amazing eyes to her slender, curvaceous figure to her sexy throaty voice. No wonder Dr. House had fallen hard. Dr. Lisa Cuddy was a cold stone fox as they use to say back in the day.

"Dr. Cuddy, I'm sure you're curious why I asked for this meeting," Dr. Nolan acknowledged.

"I am," Dr. Cuddy replied. Nolan took in her beautiful eyes, her lovely lips and thousand-watt smile. Her body was hard to ignore almost as much as the intelligence that shown through her slate-blue eyes fringed in long dark lashes. Nolan's eyes were magnetically drawn to her long sleek dark hair as it brushed against her slender throat.

"Dr. House has told me a great deal of highly positive things about you and Princeton Plainsboro and I wanted to inquire about a possible internship for my daughter who's completing her medical degree this Spring." Nolan watched her closely. Cuddy smiled broadly obviously relieved as she sighed unconsciously.

"House actually praised the hospital?" Cuddy seemed a little surprised.

"Yes, and you, Dr. Cuddy," Dr. Nolan replied.

"Thank you for telling me but it just seems so unlike Dr. House to….uh, so your daughter is a doctor?"

"She will be once she completes her residency and Princeton-Plainsboro is a fine hospital that other hospitals should model themselves after. Dr. House has spoken very highly of your leadership and the hospital's uniqueness."

Cuddy still seemed a little awe-struck to hear Nolan speak of House's praise for PPTH and of her.

"After all, it is a teaching hospital and Catherine would be very fortunate to receive an internship with Princeton Plainsboro. My daughter's specialty is endocrinology, same as yours." Dr. Nolan smiled charmingly. Cuddy felt her guard go up slightly.

"Yes, it is my specialty as well," Cuddy remarked. "I would be happy to meet with Catherine to discuss an internship here at Princeton Plainsboro." Cuddy was secretly relieved Nolan was here on purely personal business. Please have Catherine send her resume to my email account," Cuddy added as she handed her business card to the psychiatrist.

"Thank you, Dr. Cuddy, I'll make sure to tell her."

"Was there anything else you wanted to talk about?" Cuddy had to ask. The opportunity was too rare.

"No but I was wondering if you might want to talk with me?" Nolan challenged. Cuddy was uncertain what he meant.

"Um, yes, actually. I'm not asking you to reveal anything about your sessions with Dr. House but I would like to know – as his friend, not his boss – if he's doing better," Cuddy concluded lamely. What she really wanted to know is will House lose his mind again; has he mentioned how any pain increases in his leg; is he angry with her about Lucas.

"I understand, Dr. Cuddy." Dr. Nolan shifted in the chair and cleared his throat. "You're quite right that I can't delve into his treatment with you but I would say, yes, Dr. House is definitely coping better with life since Mayfield. However, I would ask your understanding and confidentiality for what I'm about to share with you." 

Dr. Cuddy's eyes widened a little. "Of course."

Dr. Nolan paused momentarily as he struggled with how to ask her a personal question without offending her. "I know we only just met but Dr. House has become rather concerned about your health."

"My health?" Cuddy was surprised. "I'm fine. I've lost a little weight recently but its nothing, really."

"Anything you want to talk about?" Dr. Nolan offered. Cuddy shook her head calmly.

"I'm fine. Just an unexpected personal matter …" Cuddy trailed off. Dr. Nolan waited for her to finish.

"Its nothing to be worried about. Once House brought it up, he started bringing me doughnuts for the past two weeks and it's been rather sweet," Cuddy smiled. "But I assure you, I'm just fine." Cuddy wasn't about to mention the phone call she overheard between Lucas and her own sister discussing what diamond shape Cuddy might prefer in an engagement ring. Somehow Cuddy felt ill prepared and unsure about the plans being made around her and for her.

"I look forward to meeting Catherine soon and I must say your efforts with Dr. House seem to be working rather well in his favor," Cuddy added. "House has certainly changed."

"Dr. House is doing quite well," Nolan replied. "Thank you so much for seeing me. I'll have my daughter contact your office next week and hopefully she'll be interning at PPTH next spring. Cuddy nodded, rose and escorted Dr. Nolan to the door of her office.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

"What did the two of you talk about?" House practically demanded of Dr. Nolan.

"A potential internship at your hospital for my daughter Catherine."

"Seriously?" House was thrown.

"Yes, seriously." Dr. Nolan smiled gently. "And you're right, Dr. Lisa Cuddy is rather accomplished and quite beautiful. How is it she's not married by now?

"Long hours behind a desk and Jew-date sucks."

"Have you given any thought to what it is you can offer her?" Nolan pretended to be preoccupied with prepping a fresh pot of coffee.

"A bit but it boils down to just another messed-up gimp with a past drug-addiction," House reiterated.

"There's more to you than that, Gregory," Nolan admonished lightly. "I truly think you're much tougher on yourself than anyone would _ever _be. It's obvious Dr. Cuddy cares a great deal about you."

"Because I'm the hospital's 'greatest asset,'" House stated as he quoted his boss.

"Not at all. She's quite interested in your recovery as a friend and not as a boss," Dr. Nolan pointed out. House looked up with hope in his eyes.

"And you know this how?"

"She said so in those exact words," Dr. Nolan smiled. House smiled slowly and glanced down to his hands to mull the words over in his mind. "And you're right, Dr. Cuddy is quite thin. I asked her about it."

"Oh God! You didn't say that I…." House asked quickly. Nolan shook his head no.

"Actually she mentioned you had been quite nice to her bringing her donuts and pizza, was it?" Nolan asked softly. House looked away slightly embarrassed at the comment. "I did learn what was behind the weight loss," Nolan added. House perked up in his chair.

"Apparently there was a 'unexpected personal matter' to deal with," Nolan said while using air quotes to highlight the significance of Cuddy's words.

"Unexpected personal matter?" House murmured. "She's not pregnant. This is interesting." Nolan watched House closely. He had learned a lot in the past couple of weeks about the nature of the feelings between House and Cuddy and the depth of their concern for each other.

"She didn't say anything else? Just an 'unexpected personal matter'?" House confirmed.

"That's what she said, Greg," Nolan answered. "But I'd like you to take time to realize what it is you have to offer a woman of Dr. Cuddy's caliber and intelligence rather than snoop around her life. Try to stray from the superficial issues and focus on things that run much deeper. Granted weight loss may not seem superficial but it is apparently being resolved. You understand what I'm saying, Greg?"

House nodded wordlessly. "Same time next week?"

"Of course," Dr. Nolan confirmed.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

_**Hope you like the direction this story is going in. Let me know your thoughts and ideas. More good things to come for Huddy fans! Please take a moment to review.**_


	9. Chapter 9 Disengaging Cuddy

_**Reviews! Where for art thou, reviews? Perhaps I doth update too fast? Oh well. I hope you like this new chapter. Should make the Huddyshippers happy….**_

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

The weekend couldn't end soon enough for House. He was curious to see Cuddy and find out what "unexpected personal matter" would stress her to the point of not eating much.

He wandered in calmly and ran right into Cuddy in the lobby. "Yo, boss-lady."

"Morning, House." Cuddy smiled. "Did you have a good weekend?"

"Fabo-tastic. You?"

"It was fine."

"Just fine?" House's curiosity piqued.

"Yep, pretty much." Cuddy said before changing the subject. "I don't have a case for you so this morning you have a prime opportunity to fulfill your clinic hours."

"Oh. yay. me." House said drolly as he slipped his arm around her shoulder and steered her toward her office. "But first, we dine! This way, itty bitty little one!"

Cuddy frowned until she saw the white bag he swayed in front of her. "Donuts? Again?"

"Not just donuts but a little bit of puffy heaven, wait 'til you see these!" The pair disappeared into her office and sat on the small couch in her office.

"House, this is very nice of you but you don't need to keep buying me donuts," Cuddy protested. House ignored her and handed her a cinnamon-sugar coated cake donut.

"Eat up, I-Blo!" House said before biting a hunk out of his donut. Cuddy frowned.

"I-Blo?" Cuddy asked.

"Itty Bitty Little One -- IBlo," House said innocently.

Cuddy rolled her eyes and forced herself to eat the fresh, warm donut. It was delicious. "Thank you for worrying about me, but I'm fine, House. Really. And don't ever call me I-Blo again."

"Who said I'm worried about you? I just don't want to see your clothes fall off because you're too skinny. Wait! What am I saying? Gimme that back!" House snatched the donut out of her hand. Cuddy frowned and snatched the donut back. She popped it in her mouth and smirked at him. House rolled his eyes at her. They were having fun until her cell phone rang. It was Lucas's ring tone. Cuddy ignored the phone. House was surprised but hid it completely.

"You're not going to get that?"

"Uh….it can wait." Had Cuddy known House knew Lucas's ringtone she would have answered the call.

_Interesting,_ House thought to himself.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

"How're you doing?" Wilson asked as he strolled into House's office. "Haven't seen you around much lately."

"I thought Sam might have devoured your head after she layed her eggs in your bowels." House said enthusiastically. "I see that's not the case."

Wilson rolled his eyes at House. "Lay off Sam, would you?"

House ignored him.

"You okay? How's the leg?" 

"I'm fine. The leg's fine. You wouldn't know anything about Cuddy's 'unexpected personal matter' would you?" House went right for the jugular. Wilson hesitated too long before disavowing any knowledge.

"Liar. Spill it. What's going on with her?" House demanded. "You owe me that."

"I absolutely can not say another word about it or she'll kill me," Wilson pleaded.

"I'll kill you if you don't better yet, I'll find something that will make Sam want to kill you."

"Do what you gotta, House because I absolutely can not say anything."

House leaned forward at his desk and appraised Wilson's nervous expression. "I'll find out one way or another."

"House, leave it alone. It doesn't involve you."

"If it involves Cuddy, it involves me," House retorted. "Is she pregnant?"

"What? I don't know!" Wilson exclaimed with a large frown.

"So she's not pregnant," House confirmed.

"I have no idea!"

"So pregnancy isn't the 'unexpected personal matter'?" House cajoled.

"Not as far as I know," Wilson said with a shrug. "Besides if she _was_ pregnant she would be thrilled to death, right?"

"Yeah, probably," House said gruffly.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

"Why so glum, glamourpuss?" House asked Cuddy in the clinic.

"I'm fine, what makes you say that?" Cuddy asked smoothly.

"You like someone killed your cat?"

"I don't have a cat," Cuddy retorted.

"Details, lady. Why no pep in your step?"

"My sister's coming to visit this weekend."

"Yowsza, bummer."

"Yeah, tell me about it." Cuddy finished detailing her notes and closed the file before handing it to the head nurse.

"When's she getting here?"

"Wednesday."

"Mid-week? Thought she has kids."

"Yup."

"Maybe she'll fall in love with Lucas and they'll run away together!" House suggested. Cuddy rolled her eyes and sighed deeply.

"A guy can dream, can't he?" House defended himself. "We could run away together …."

Cuddy shot him a look that could kill.

"….and grab dinner and call it a meeting?" House suggested. "It'll at least keep her away from you for a couple of hours."

"That's a thought," Cuddy laughed. "I'll get back to you on that!"

"Just remember we go by motorcycle Wednesday!" House said with a waggle of the brow before calling his next clinic patient.

Cuddy starred after him as the clinic nurses murmured between themselves over House's comments. "Great!" Cuddy whispered to herself as she called her next patient from the waiting room.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

"Lisa, I'm looking forward to seeing you and Lucas tomorrow night!" Cuddy's sister's voice buzzed over Cuddy's cellphone on the drive home. "You two are so cute together. Remember at Thanksgiving? Lucas was just adorable with Rachel and you. He's a really sweet guy and obviously so in love with you!"

Cuddy was dying to ask her about the call she overheard.

"Mark doesn't mind you visiting during the week? What about your girls?" Cuddy asked.

"Oh it'll do him good to see what I do everyday for the girls. He'll live."

"I know Rachel will be excited to see her auntie," Cuddy said pleasantly. "I've got to tell you it's been a hell of a week and I'll have to work late to finish a proposal with one of our insurers before Friday."

"Oh? That's okay. As long as you're free by the weekend."

"Is something going on this weekend I don't know about?" Cuddy prodded.

"Uh…well, yeah. Um, I wasn't suppose to tell you but I think Lucas may want to take you somewhere special this weekend."

"Like over-night?" Cuddy was not thrilled. She had a terrible feeling Lucas might use the getaway to propose to her. She just wasn't ready to hear that. She wasn't sure she knew what she wanted in her relationship with Lucas. Why couldn't it just go on as it is. Monogamous, sweet, fun …

"Is that okay?"

"Karen, I think he wants to propose to me," Cuddy said slowly.

"Omigod, how'd you find out?" Cuddy's sister was shocked.

"I picked up the phone to make a call and overheard him talking to you about diamond rings and stones and something about the shape of the stone I might like…" Cuddy was rambling. "I don't think I'm ready for… for…that"

"Oh Lisa, Lucas is so excited about this. We're suppose to going shopping together Thursday afternoon when you're at work."

"Karen, you should have told me!"

"Don't hang this on me. You overheard the call and haven't told him you're not ready!" Karen shot back. Cuddy knew her older sister was right.

"Could you …just find a good reason to cancel this visit? I really don't want him to go ring shopping. I need more time to think about this and if he and I have a future together."

"You're not breaking up with him are you?" Karen was worried.

"No, nothing like that but I'm not ready to get married." Cuddy replied in low voice.

"Lisa, you're 42 years old. If you're not ready to get married now, when will you be?" Karen sounded exasperated with her kid sister. "What you mean is you're not ready to marry Lucas. Am I right?"

Cuddy stayed silent.

"Please tell me you're over House!" Karen sounded mad.

"What are you talking about?" Cuddy sounded stunned.

"I know you, Lisa Cuddy! You use to talk about him so much until he went nuts and Lucas showed up.."

"Karen!"

"It's true, he went nuts," Karen spit back.

"No, he went to Mayfield to detox off vicodin. His leg pain caused his addiction and that caused his hallucinations…." Cuddy fired back.

"Whatever. Just don't throw away a chance to have a happy life with Lucas for that jerk. He's not worthy of you…"

"Karen, stop it. It's not his fault. I did it to him. I'm to blame for his leg…" 

"No, Lisa! You are not at fault. Stop blaming yourself…."

"Karen, I'm pulling into my driveway. Can we just not do this right now?" Cuddy said with a small hitch in her throat. Karen heard it plainly and she suddenly felt enormous sadness for her sister's situation.

"I'll find a reason and let Lucas know I can't make it this week," Karen relented. "I'll call you tomorrow and let you know how it goes with Lucas, okay?"

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Cuddy was so relieved. "I owe you."

"No you don't, I love you, girl."

"I love you, too." Cuddy smiled and hung up. She parked the car and sighed. An enormous weight was lifted from her shoulders. She actually felt thrilled as she gathered her things to enter the house. Lucas met her at the door with a kiss and a chubby little girl in his arms.

"Hey Gorgeous," Lucas said as he stole a kiss. Cuddy pecked him back.

"Mama!" Rachel's arms reached for her mother. Cuddy grinned and took the child from Lucas.

"Hey Honey, what smells so good?" Cuddy asked Lucas.

"Your favorite, me!" Lucas teased. "Oh, uh eggplant parmesan, your other favorite." Cuddy grinned at him and Rachel smooched her mother on the cheek. Lucas closed the door.

**xoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxxxxxxxxxoooooooooooo**

_**Sometimes things just work out. Cuddy knows she's not ready to get married at least not to Lucas. Hope Huddy fans are happy with this outcome. Now, how to get House and Cuddy together? Hmmmmmmm. Suggestions? Please review and shoot me your ideas. Thanks for reading!**_


	10. Chapter 10 Figuring out the Possibilitie

Cuddy was a new woman Wednesday morning. She eagerly looked forward to House's morning visit and the promise of sugary donuts. She'd surprise him today and eat them all. Her appetite had returned!

_**xoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"You little animal!" House said in admiring tone. "Look who's hungry for my 'donuts'!" Cuddy smacked his arm at the innuendo.

"You going to finish yours?" Cuddy asked sweetly.

"Please, help yourself!" House slid his donut over to her. "So what's got you so hungry this morning? And please, no details if it involves Lucas."

Cuddy grinned mischievously. "My sister isn't coming today!"

"Seriously? Good for you!" House said kindly. "Wait, shit. That kills my hopes for her and Lucas running off together. Damn." Cuddy ignored him but a small smile appeared at the corner of her mouth. "How'd you do it?"

Cuddy's head snapped up. "I didn't do anything! I'm just lucky, I guess!"

"If you were that lucky you'd be with me!" House said quietly. The moment suddenly felt tense. Cuddy's eyes met his. House wouldn't look away from her forcing her to as her cheeks blushed.

"Clinic hours?" Cuddy reminded him.

House recognized the deflection technique. "I'm all caught up, mommy. But I'll do more if you'll grab dinner with me tonight."

"Tonight?" Cuddy questioned.

"Yeah, why not? Your sister's not coming so you don't have to be home right away. Plus I want to see if your newfound appetite is really back or if you're faking it."

"I never fake anything!" Cuddy flirted.

"I remember." House shot back and Cuddy realized they had ventured into dangerous territory.

"See you in the clinic?" Cuddy asked as she changed the subject swiftly.

"If we're on for dinner, I'll be in the clinic today."

"Fine," Cuddy tried to sound slightly annoyed but she was secretly pleased at the prospect. "Uh, do we really have to go on your motorcycle?"

"A deal's a deal," House reminded her.

"Great." Cuddy sounded unenthusiastic.

"It's swingy kinda skirt you got there, it'll work, just pin your legs against mine and your skirt shouldn't blow off."

Cuddy's eyes grew large. "I hope it rains!"

"Ooh, you in a wet blouse? Yes, please let it rain!"

"If it rains, we go in my car!" Cuddy said seriously.

"Fine. See you around 6?" House relinquished even though his heart was beating excitedly.

"No, I'll see you in a half hour in the clinic. But yes, 6 works for dinner. Where do you want to go?"

"I'll think of something," House said in a rather sexy voice.

"You're paying this time!" Cuddy reminded him.

"Yeah, yeah but only if we go on my bike. That _was _the deal!" House pushed. Cuddy relented.

"Bye, House!" Cuddy said as she gathered up the donut napkins and stuffed them into the white paper bag before tossing it in the trash.

"Bye I-Blo," House teased.

"Don't call me that!"

"Fine. Cuddles. Ta-ta!" House left with a happy feeling in his chest and a large grin on his face.

_**xoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"And how did the dinner date go?" Dr. Nolan asked. He was clearly pleased to see things working out for House and Cuddy if only to reestablish their 20-year-long friendship.

"It went very well," House laughed as he remembered how Cuddy had difficulty getting situated on the back of his motorcycle. "You should have seen her sitting on my motorcycle. She was terrified but wouldn't admit it."

"How do you know she was terrified?" Nolan asked.

"Her nails were buried in my flesh!"

"What?" Nolan sat up with a laugh.

"Yeah, she was clinging to me for dear life. Her skinny arms were wrapped around me pretty tight and her nails were dug into my gut. If it wasn't so funny I'd…." House began chuckling at the memory. Nolan laughed a little with him. It was nice to see Greg House enjoying a moment's levity.

"So you made her ride on your bike?"

"That was the deal," House replied. "In a skirt, too."

"Oh, God!" Dr. Nolan started laughing at Cuddy's gumption. "Nice, man." Nolan said sarcastically.

"I thought she'd back out but she didn't. She wore this huge helmet and a leather jacket that was too big on her. She looked pretty adorable." House rubbed his stubbly chin and recalled the memory vividly.

"She's a good sport."

"She really is," House admitted. _He had no way of knowing just how intense the situation was for Cuddy riding on the back of his motorcycle, holding on to a man in such a highly physical way. Cuddy had even dreamed about House that night and woke up the next morning hugging onto Lucas from behind. She could hardly face House the next morning at the hospital._

"Then what happened?" Nolan asked. He was quite pleased to see the change in House's demeanor, from sulking and sad to hopeful and happy.

"We went inside, ate a meal together and then rode back to the hospital." House answered. "And she actually ate most of her dinner. I thought she was turning into an air fern.

"A what?"

"You know, air ferns? Those little green airy ferns that grow on rocks with no visible source of food or water. Air ferns."

"Okay. That's it?"

"Well, yeah. What'd you expect? We'd run off and elope?" House said sarcastically.

"It _is_ an option," Nolan said seriously. House shut up and stared at the psychiatrist stunned at his suggestion.

"Oh come on, you're telling me you've never thought about it?" Nolan asked.

"Marriage?" House seemed surprised.

"Yes, marriage. Growing old with her."

"With Cuddy?" House was trying to backpedal and find a suitable answer to deflect properly.

"No, with Wilson. Of course, with Cuddy!" Nolan snapped.

"I …I'm not the marrying kind, remember?"

"And why is that?"

"Because I'm an ass, at least that's what women often tell me."

"But you're not the _same _ass you use to be." Nolan pointed out.

"Ass-lite?"

"Something like that," Nolan said with a small smirk. "You're a lot nicer now. Human, even, at times."

"Yeah, yeah. You're a real Charmer. If you say so." House seemed a little embarrassed.

"You could be a really happy guy one day, Greg. It's entirely possible, you know."

"I'll be happy when Cuddy dumps that loser Lucas. Then …" House trailed off.

Nolan waited for a few minutes hoping for House to continue on. "Then what?"

House glanced up at Nolan and didn't know what to say. He shrugged resignedly.

Nolan nodded. "So if Dr. Cuddy is ever 'single' again, what would you do about it?"

"It's not …that easy, you know. I mean for one thing, she's still my boss." House explained.

"Who you're in love with," Nolan pointed out. "Come on, we both know you got it bad!" Nolan added at the look of vulnerability on House's face.

House nodded grudgingly. He knew he was in love with Cuddy but it felt a little naked to have your psychiatrist state it like it was no big deal when in fact it was the biggest deal in his life.

"It sucks."

"What, that you're in love with your boss?" Nolan seemed surprised.

"No, it sucks that I'm in love with my boss and we can't be together without one of us having to leave the hospital.

"What makes you so sure that would happen?" Nolan had to ask. "Are you saying if the board knew you were dating, one of you would have to resign?"

"Yeah and that someone would definitely have to be me. Cuddy's too valuable." House fidgeted a little with his shirt. "If we could just be like we are now but together, it would be perfect…"

"So you're saying you'd rather work at Princeton Plainsboro than be with the woman you love?" Nolan was surprised.

"God, no! What I mean is if I left the hospital and she and I ….didn't work out then I've lost her. I mean I wouldn't ever see her anymore. I'd be working somewhere else and she'd still be there and it would be over."

"What makes you think it wouldn't work out between you two?" Nolan asked.

"Because nothing lasts forever," House retorted.

"You and Cuddy have lasted for a couple of decades…"

"…as friends." House reminded Nolan.

"Most successful long-term relationships between men and women are built first on a solid basis of friendship. I'd say you two have that box checked."

"Right. I'll just go up to my boss and propose to her between meetings." House said half-heartedly.

"Maybe the problem is you're thinking of Cuddy as a boss first and a woman second?"

"Actually, I always think of Cuddy as a woman. Trust me. You've seen her." House looked up. "It's just that things are complicated."

"Look, Greg. If you want this woman you have a couple of options but recognize there are complications so it'll take some serious consideration to make things work."

"Like?"

"Like your boss has a reputation to protect and you can't treat any romance with her lightly. For starters, you two need to actually date secretly to see if she feels as seriously as you do. If she does, then you two should talk about where you want this romance to go…if you're not ready to marry each other you'll have to keep the relationship secret from everyone or risk jeopardizing your job and hers. That means you can't live together or anything. But, if you do decide you want to marry her and she agrees, you'll have to recognize the risks that one of you may have to work elsewhere but at least you'll be together."

House was quiet.

"Then again, maybe neither one of you would have to leave Princeton-Plainsboro. Aren't there married couples among the staff." 

"Sure," House acknowledged. "But you can't report to a spouse."

"So you report to someone other than Cuddy or maybe Cuddy and Wilson or some other board member?" Nolan suggested.

House's mind was churning.

"You listening?" Nolan asked.

"Yeah, I'm listening and everything you've just said makes sense. There's just one problem." House said dejectedly.

"Lucas?"

"Lucas!" House agreed. "She's still with him and they're practically living together."

"Didn't you tell me she ignores his calls?"

"Well, she did once, when we were eating donuts in her office."

"It's a start, House." Nolan raised his eyebrows and nodded. House knew it.

"Look, you need to figure out how far you want things to go with Cuddy. I mean she has a daughter now and she may need more stability in her life ….like marriage…or not. Either way, you need to find out what it is she wants for her own life and make sure its compatible with what you want ultimately," Nolan said encouragingly. "If it is, I think you might be making a mistake waiting for Lucas to disappear. But its' your life and its your decision."

House was a mix of emotions. He appreciated hearing the options he hadn't allowed himself the luxury of considering with Cuddy. He couldn't get past the fact of their working relationship would cost someone their job and hers was more of an accomplishment than his. He had a lot to think about.

"Hey, at least she's eating again …and filling out her suits quite nicely again," House wiggled his eyebrows a little. Nolan laughed.

"Think about it?" Nolan asked.

"I will." House said firmly. "See you next week."

"I'll be here." Nolan nodded and House waved as he left Nolan's office.

_**xoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

_**Is this getting out of character for House or Cuddy or even Nolan? Please send me your thoughts. Wow, three chapters in one night. Say good night, Reisling! Please review.**_


	11. Chapter 11 Lines drawn in the sand

Foreman entered the lab and found Thirteen and Chase working on their newest case's test results.

"Any news?"

"The tests results are all normal so far," Chase answered.

"Have you told House?" Foreman asked.

"Not yet," Thirteen said.

"Does House seem…," Foreman hesitated to finish. "…off?" 

"What do you mean?" Chase asked.

"He's been pretty mellow lately," Foreman replied.

"He's preoccupied," Thirteen volunteered. Foreman and Chase looked at her a little surprised.

"About what?" They asked her in unison.

"I know that look," Thirteen said as she stood up and gathered her notes. "He's in love."

Foreman laughed. "No way that selfish bastard loves anyone."

"Did someone call my name?" House said asked suddenly. Chase and Thirteen looked paniced, Foreman shut his eyes. "Who do I love?"

"The tests came back normal," Foreman stalled hoping House would let it go. House stared at Foreman warily.

"Looks like we're going to be here late tonight unless someone figures out what is killing our patient. Of course that won't be a problem for me because this selfish bastard has nothing better to do, am I right?" House said on his way out of the lab. Chase and Thirteen glared at Foreman.

"That was cold, Foreman," Thirteen admonished him. "He has feelings, too you know."

Chase shook his head at Foreman. "Nice, real nice."

Foreman protested. "How was I to know he was right behind me? He's still acting weird!" It didn't matter. Chase and Thirteen left Foreman behind.

Chase turned to Thirteen as they walked down the hall, "Foreman's right, you know."

"House is not a selfish bastard," Thirteen retorted. "He's in pain and he's obviously hurting. You should know what it feels like to love somebody who doesn't want you."

Chase was embarrassed at the reference to Cameron. He ignored it. "I meant Foreman was right that House is acting 'off' these days."

"Oh, sorry." Thirteen mumbled.

"You don't think House is back on vicodin do you?" Chase asked.

"I don't know but I think he's struggling."

"About what?"

"Cuddy. Don't tell me you don't notice how he looks at her?" Thirteen rolled her eyes at Chase.

"Yeah, but that's gone on for years."

"Cuddy's got a boyfriend now – that guy Lucas – you're the one who told me about him. Haven't you noticed how House isn't making baudy comments about her body anymore?"

"Come to think of it, you're right." Chase seemed surprised. "Poor bastard."

"They belong together – Cuddy and House." Thirteen blurted out.

"What are you, a matchmaker, now?" Chase teased her.

"That's not a bad idea," Thirteen said with a gleam in her eye. Chase suddenly realized she was serious. "Think Foreman would help us?"

"Do what? Get Cuddy together with House?" Chase clarified. "Are you nuts!?" 

"I'm just saying that if House isn't happy, we're all going to be miserable. Think about it," Thirteen said.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxxoxoxxxoxoxoxoxoooxox**_

House blasted through the doors of Cuddy's office prepared to ask for approval to do not one, but two, unorthodox procedures when he stopped in his tracks.

"Are you …crying?" House asked Cuddy. He had caught her wiping her eyes quickly as she glanced up. Her pale eyes were clearly wet and reddened.

"I'm fine. What do you need, House?" Cuddy quickly spun around in her chair to turn her back to him and hide her puffy eyes. House came up behind her and stood there silently unsure of what to do or say.

"Are you alright, Cuddy?" House's tone was gentle.

"It's nothing."

House placed a hand on her shoulder and rubbed it gently. The gesture made Cuddy sniffle as a lump rose in her throat. She couldn't tell him she'd had a fight with Lucas who had just accused her that morning of cheating on him with House.

"Is Rachel okay?" House had to know what was upsetting her. He wasn't going to ignore this problem. Cuddy moved to stand up and head to her bathroom, House didn't move out of her path.

"She's fine. Just give me a moment." Cuddy said weakly. House stood there awkwardly. He decided Nolan was right. Why wait. House stepped forward and crouched a little just enough to see tears sliding down her cheek. He pulled her to him and hugged her firmly.

"Hey, what's the matter, Cuddy?" House surprised himself a little. He couldn't help but reach out to her and hold her. She didn't move or try to move away. She just stood there.

Cuddy couldn't speak. The lump in her throat was too big and she was afraid to make a sound for fear of losing her composure. They stood there together, House holding her close, Cuddy hiding her face against his chest and trying to stop the tears.

Cuddy began to pull away and wipe her face again. "I'm fine."

"You're not going to tell me?" House asked. Cuddy shook her head. "Must be Lucas then."

Cuddy pulled back sharply. "We had an argument." Cuddy glared at House despite being mad at herself for divulging the truth to him.

"Every couple argues," House shot back. His arms were still around her and he pulled her back to him. "He sucks anyway." Cuddy smiled at the crack. "Go on. You can tell me."

She shook her head. House realized she wasn't going to share more details.

"Why don't you just dump him and be with me," House said earnestly. Cuddy looked at him with a frown.

"You wouldn't know what to do with me, House." Cuddy cajoled. She was trying to get her mind off the accusations Lucas had made.

"Yes, I would. For starters…" House leaned down and kissed her softly. Cuddy froze at the move. House kissed her softly at first before deepening it and squeezing her tightly to him. Cuddy was stunned. She felt his tongue gliding along her lips seeking entrance to her warm wet mouth. She felt unnerved and sighed allowing him entrance. Their mouths pressed together, their tongues gently exploring the other.

Cuddy felt her knees weaken as she leaned against House's chest. It felt so right to be in his arms. House wasn't pulling back. It was his first chance to pour out his soul to her and he held nothing back. Cuddy was overwhelmed. She forgot where they were and let herself be taken. House's lips played along her neck, his breathing deepening as his hands slid across her back and waist. One hand slid up to the back of her neck and kept her pressed to him.

It was electric, the intensity of their attraction and longing for one another unleashed. She had forgotten they were in her office. She had forgotten House was her employee. She had forgotten all about Lucas. _This_ was right.

"Greg," Cuddy whispered heavily into his ear as he continued kissing her neck and running his fingers through her long dark hair. "Wait. What are we doing?"

"Leave him, Lisa," House urged her. He pulled back long enough to stare her in the eyes. "Leave him, be with me. I love you. You love me. I feel it."

Cuddy felt emotionally naked. He was right and he knew it. "Wait. What? You …"

"You heard me, I love you," House said sternly.

"You do?"

"For years."

"Why didn't you say somethi.." Cuddy's question was interrupted as House kissed her again, harder than before. Cuddy kissed him back just as intensely. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him as close to her as she could. They were completely unaware of anything and anyone around them.

"Goddamn it! I knew it!" Lucas roared at the pair startling House and Cuddy from their embrace. "I fucking knew you were cheating on me with that son of a bitch!" Lucas was pointing at House, his face contorted with anger and reddening.

"How did you get in here?" House demanded. "I locked that door…"

"Key?" Lucas yelled as he threw it at House who ducked just as the metal object whizzed past his face. "I knew you were fucking him!"

"Lucas, keep your voice down! Stop screaming!" Cuddy moved towards him but House pulled her back for her own safety.

"How long as this been going on between you?" Lucas demanded. House shot him a cool look.

"About ten minutes, longer if you hadn't barged in!" The comment only enraged Lucas as it was designed to do. Lucas charged at House who met him halfway across Cuddy's office. Lucas threw a punch at House's face but House leaned back enough for the swing to complete miss him. House reared back with his right arm and brought down a solid hook to Lucas's nose knocking the man on his ass. Lucas ignored the blood spurting down his face and shirt and lunged at House. Cuddy was frozen still staring as the two men grappled and fought each other. House got the upper-hand and shoved Lucas away. House stepped in front of Cuddy and told Lucas to calm down.

"She hasn't cheated on you, you idiot!" House sneered. "She was upset…"

"Lucas! I never cheated on you!" Cuddy was angry.

"Don't lie to me, Lisa! I saw you kissing him, his hands were all over you!" Lucas was incensed as he began advancing on Cuddy. Cuddy stood her ground and refused to let House step between them."

"I was upset about our fight this morning. And up until a few minutes ago, I hadn't deserved any of those things you said this morning." Cuddy said angrily.

"So now it's my fault?" Lucas was livid.

"I kissed her, you moron!" House sneered as he stepped up to embrace Cuddy's shoulder. The sight of it only infuriated Lucas. "I made the first move, and I told her what I told you months ago – I love her. Cuddy gasped as she glanced back between House and Lucas. Lucas knew House loved her? Lucas never told her anything about that.

Lucas turned to Cuddy. "If I hadn't walked in here you'd have fucked him on that infamous desk he gave you!" Cuddy stepped forward and slapped Lucas hard on the cheek. He shut up immediately. He knew he had gone to far. Cuddy would never forgive him for it.

"Leave. Get out!" Cuddy said through gritted teeth. Lucas glared at House then looked at Cuddy.

"I'm…I'm sorry, Lisa. I …" Lucas fumbled.

"Go, Lucas, now!" Cuddy sounded so cold. House looked pained for his former friend but he wasn't about to trade places with him.

"You heard her," House added. Lucas looked broken. He glanced at Cuddy and back to House. "You two deserve each other! I hope you make each other very miserable!" Lucas shot back as he spun away and stormed out slamming one door to bounce against the wall in her office. Nurses from the front desk were collected around her foyer and staring at the melee that had just dissolved with Lucas's departure.

"I thought he'd never leave," House cracked. He felt Cuddy's body trembling and rubbed her arm a little. "It'll be okay. I promise."

Cuddy looked up at him. "Promise?"

"I do. Uh, sorry about the lamp." House mumbled.

"What lamp?" Cuddy glanced past him and realized her desk lamp was a casualty of male testosterone, along with the framed picture of Cuddy and Lucas. Both lay broken on the floor. "Oh."

Cuddy walked over to straighten up some of the furniture that had been knocked out of place. House followed her and pulled her arm toward him. "We're going to be okay, you and me. No one I'd rather be miserable with." House grinned at her. Cuddy didn't smile back.

"You really think we'd make each other miserable?" Cuddy asked faintly.

"Yeah about 30% of the time. Which means great make-up sex!" House joked. Cuddy smiled at him. Leave it to House to bring things back to sex.

"You figure we could be happy the rest of that time?"

"Ecstatically so. Disgustingly so. Other couples will hate us for how happy will be together." House grinned. Cuddy smiled for the first time.

"You better be right."

"I'm always right," House reminded her. "C'mere." House moved in on her and kissed her softly. She hugged him and laid her head against his chest, he nuzzled her forehead and rubbed her back before reaching down and patting her ass. "See, ecstatically so."

"Is that your cane?" Cuddy asked playfully as something hard pressed against her stomach.

"You know what that is," House said mirthfully. "And unless you want me to 'unleash the hound' we better stop this right now." Cuddy laughed lightly.

"Fine. Uhm I better call Maria and tell her about Lucas."

"Why don't you and I go there. Just in case Lucas does something stupid." House said calmly.

"You don't think…." Cuddy began but House cut her off.

"Just give him time to cool off and he'll be fine," House assured her.

"Dr. Cuddy, is everything all right?" The voice belonged to a large security guard who was obviously a day late and a dollar short had Cuddy been in any physical danger. "We got a call from the lobby desk about a commotion in your office." The guard pointedly kept his gaze on the broken lamp on the floor.

Cuddy smiled weakly and assured the guard all was fine before House cut in.

"Just another patient's family member I managed to piss off. You know me, all sunshine, giggles and sweetness!" House hammed it up. The guard, familiar with House's reputation, rolled his eyes and looked back at the Dean.

"Is that right, Dean Cuddy?" The guard needed to hear the 'all-clear' from the top brass.

"Everything is fine, Henry. He's not the first unhappy individual to blow up over Dr. House, I'm sure he won't be the last," Cuddy smiled and the guard nodded before leaving and shooting an annoyed look at House.

"Niccceeeeee." House smiled at her. Cuddy rolled her eyes, shook her head slightly and phoned her nanny.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

**Well, how'd you like this turn of events? Thoughts? I had to get the tension dealt with and Lucas just has to go! Right? Should it end here or go on. Let me know your thoughts, readers and thanks for the reviews so far. Not sure what should happen next but I'm playing with a few ideas so let me know if this is where the story should end. Although another session with Nolan on the fight and breakup would be fun to write. Hmmmm.**


End file.
